The only thing keeping me alive is the thought that I could emd it soon.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Supreme_G, Sep 3, 2009.

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  1. Supreme_G

    Supreme_G Member

    Two weeks ago I wanted someone to tell me it would be okay and it helped then but now... The only way get through the day is by planning how and when to end it all.

    I'm lonely. And I've got nothing to live for. I get that my family won't be better off without me but for once I plan on being selfish. It hurts to be alive.

    I hate myself because it really is all my fault and I take all the blame.
  2. pinkpanther85

    pinkpanther85 Member

    Can I ask what has happened in your life to make you feel like this? Do you suffer from low self-esteem or self-worth?

    I know its a very hard place to be and no doubt you feel you have run out of options, but please remember there are people here to talk to :) Alot of us have been where you are and have managed to crawl out of the dark hole of nothingness time after time.

    Talk to us and maybe we can point you in the right direction :console:
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Yes it hurts to be alive we all are hurting and in pain but we manage to survive because we know there is still a smichen of hope things will be better. If you can't hold on then get help call and get help so you can have another chance at doing things right. Please the thoughts you are having are because of your depression. Treat the depression things will be better call your therapist your doctor emerg and get help to get rid of this pain your in. You posted here so in your heart you want to make it so please try a little harder stay with us a little longer until these feeling pass as they will pass and then call your Therapist and tell them you need extra help a earlier appt. Hang in there okay like the rest of us you can do this.
  4. Chernarus

    Chernarus Well-Known Member

    Violet is right get help when your over you pain or feel just a smudge better. Because depression if not treated will really hurt you and suicide is not the answer you cant give up theirs so much out there that is available to people these days think of it you got the world by the balls theirs bad help and theirs real good help and if you dont get it right away keep trying because sooner or later youll find the real good help it took me two years but it was worth every ounce of pain and suffering.
  5. yursomedicated

    yursomedicated Chat & Forum Buddy

    I'm not going to be a hypocrite. It hurts. The pain and lonliness gets to everyone. Do you have anyone to talk to? A friend, doctor?

    I'm sure it's not all your fault. It can't be. I'm here for you. If you ever need anything, you can always talk to me.
  6. Zola

    Zola Antiquities Friend

    Boy, do I know that feeling! It's only thinking about doing it that keeps me here every day. And drinking whisky from 5 A.M. on. Wine and beer don't cut it. I've planned out two separate ways, depending on how much money I have (very close to zero). Both involve firearms, which I've never had before and don't have now. Thanks to the laws of my state, that's easy to rectify.

    There's something soothing about planning each detail, so when the time comes, everything can be done easily, without thought.

    Take care,

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