I feel as if suicide is the only answer. Back in April after 5yrs of marriage I moved all my husband's things into the garage and changed the locks he was emotionally and financially abusive. I got a job at a grocery store and was required to wear a face mask, which caused me to have horrendous flashbacks of childhood abuse. I had gone through life not remembering any of it, now however the floodgates have opened, I ended up walking out on my job which is very unlike me as I used to enjoy working. My friends have given up on me, I tried reconnecting with a few but they never contact me. To top it off my cat crawled under the house and died and he was my only friend and source of comfort, its pathetic I know but such is my life. I'm just waiting for this <mod edit - timeline> as I can't have them find me, but I do feel as if they would be better off without me, I'm a crappy mom and barely able to take care of them, just the basics of feeding and changing diapers. I'm supposed to be homeschooling but I cant even do that. They deserve better then I can give. I've been cutting trying to get some relief but it's not really working so well.Sorry if this doesn't make any sense just tired of holding it all in
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