I'm feeling extremely suicidal today. Just laid on the bed and cried my brains out. It's starting to seem like this is the best opportunity to do it. I have no more excuses to continue hanging around a place I don't and will never belong. I'm sick and tired of being a doormat, a disposable underwear or a ball which everyone kicks and bounces around. I am utterly disgusted with myself. I am tired of everything. I am tired of being used. No one spares a thought for my feelings. No one. I am a grub. A pointless grub. A waste of space and resources. A bane to society. I seem to have more reasons to die than to live. That, itself, is reason enough for me to perform my vanishing act, no?