Some people are just born into favorable circumstances, with favorable features. What's the ideal image of a lucky person? Someone who is born stinking rich, with good looks, with a loving family, and who has everything going for him/her, never having to go through any crippling mental disorder, or any catastrophes besides what is common to man. Fucking spoiled brats sheltered in a protective cacoon most of their lives. What about the rest of us? People like me? I have nothing going for me. No hope. I am as ugly, as retarded, as defective as Medusa. I have zero motivation, life most likely will be a struggle to pay off rent and live off of crumbs, life will be empty and meaningless. I will most likely die a loner. I feel like savagely killing happy people, and most of all I hate myself to no avail. I want to destroy human beings whom I envy- I want to slowly destroy their lives first, and then kill them. I want to destroy their careers/grades, take away everyone who loves them and those whom they love, physically marr them, pyschologically abuse them, destroy any lingering shreds of hope, I want to make them go through what I went through, and then kill them in the most brutal fashion possible. I so desperately want to be born in their situation, I want to feel what they feel, I want to know what's it's like to be loved, truly loved and cared for by your family, by other people, I want to know what it feels like to have genuine feelings, and concerns, I want to know how it feels like to be alive. I'm starving for the life that they lead. Anyone else have this problem?