My father raped and tortured me for 8 long years. I am just starting to deal with my feelings about this. I hate myself so much because of what happened to me even though I was not to blame. I think it destroyed me in many ways, in ways that make me worthless and unlovable and that is why I want to die so badly. I don't seem to have any hope that it is possible to heal from such abuse. It is possible to survive, but I don't think it is possible to heal such an injury. I hope someone can prove me wrong.