The rules

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Kaos General, May 28, 2011.

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  1. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    There may be a time in chat or on the forums that the staff will ask for your cooperation to maintain a safe environment for all members. Staff have the right to reserve judgment on what may or may not be triggering or appropriate. If you are asked to refrain from something, please remember that the staff have the members of this forums best interest in mind and at heart. Feel free to discuss the request with the staff in the Letters to the Management subforum.

    Being suicidal yourself does not give you the right to act how you want. Remember this is a peer to peer support forum, that means members are expected to support and be nice to each other.

    None of the Staff or members here are trained in therapy of any kind. SF is no substitute for professional help, so we urge you to consult a doctor regarding treatment, medication or the like.

    People seem to have trouble finding them and get all angry when they cant seem to understand why they are being given an infraction so ive copy and pasted the main 3 to go through each one so their cant be no more confusion.

    1. What you say must be respectful and if it is deemed to be offensive the you will be pulled up on this. More often than not people will be told to calm it down. If your suicidal then thats fine YOU CAN talk about it but not methods, if you wanna talk about that then you are in the wrong place. Site ethos is Do no Harm, promote no harm. If you say something that goes against that then something will be done because your causing harm to others then. You are not the only person on here. Their are people from the ages of 13-XX. This is not an adult site. Their are kids on here under the age of 18 so they have to be kept safe due to the legal issues. If you dont like that then thats tough because its law. The biggest one here is take it into LtM. If you have a problem with staff or the way you deem to have been treated the take it into LtM, or PM one of the admins or the mods if you feel more safer doing that. Making thread after thread after thread about the same thing is just counter productive and will leave you feeling even more angry and dejected.

    2. This means if your suicidal that doesnt give you the right to be an asshole. You arent the only person on the forum and the entire universe does not revolve around you. If you are suicidal, people will reach out to you and talk to you, eventually. When we are suicidal sometimes we expect everyone to stop what they are doing and focus solely on you. This isnt fair or neither will it happen. Most of us on here are dealing with feelings of death and destruction towards ourselves, but to expect everyone to understand is where the problem lies. Sometimes people wont understand, the same as IRL.

    3. This is the main one which people need to keep in mind. They are us. They have their own problems. Some of them are suicidal and the such.

    If you still have problems then go and read the rest of the rules which can be found here:
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Well said wayne, you put it nicely. :smile:
  3. NoMoneyToPlease

    NoMoneyToPlease Banned Member

    There are more ways to cause trouble and whip up drama than being a rule breaker.

    Being a suck up who erases the memory of their constant trouble making by wholly supporting one side,at the detriment of the other,for a set amount of time,is one of the ways.

    Calling for legitimate discussion threads to be locked is another.This can only increase tension within the community.
    Steam builds up and attitudes harden.

    Angerfist,you are a good guy,but believe me some people do this on other forums.
    So glad that you're here to defuse the tension. :)

    I love you. :turtle:
  4. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Discussion about the subject in question never ever ends well which is why the threads get instantly locked and we get told to put it in LtM because its such an emotive issue for some people. Id love more than nothing than to have a decent discussion on this but it just never happens. Ive been here too long to see what happens when the threads are allowed to play out. They get stopped to prevent giving out infractions more than anything. The staff dont like giving them out unless they really have to and if they can prevent it before it starts then they will.

    I am far from a suck up if that is aimed at me and i know i have fucked up un the past, but i learn from my mistakes and ive gained some sort of understanding.
  5. NoMoneyToPlease

    NoMoneyToPlease Banned Member

    This post implies that there are two sides involved in some kind of situation.But that's not what you want is it,I know that because you said so yourself.
    My god, we're all in the same boat here.

    I am glad this post is not being taken as a complaint,or it would be locked.It would also be locked if admin believed you to be carrying on the same moot discussion.

    But then again this post does seem to be pro one side,not like the open debates that have been clamped down upon today.

    You know what,there are some people in this world who could get to thinking that you and and unnamed biased censor are making quite a tag team today.

    I'm not one of them.Those people are uncharitable poo-poo heads.

    I still love you.More than before if anything.
    My turtle of truth. :turtle:
  6. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i have so much to say

    but don't want to get your thread locked

    can just say maybe we can agree to disagree...

    this site needs more room for healthy dialogue

    ps management knows how i feel, i have plenty of ltm's out there. just in case you were going to tell me to address it privately...
  7. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Ya know what i aint for or against anyone but myself. Im just saying what i think. People seem to think that the mods are just a bunch of asshpoles for doing their jobs and they have been getting stick all week because people cant be bothered to read the rules. Then over the past week their has been thread after thread after thread about something or other complaining about what they are doing and that they are useless. I can see both sides but at the end of the day if people actually bothered to read the rules then their would be no need for any sort of confusion. Their job is hard enough as it is, i just think we should cut the some slack. I mean if anyone who has complained this week were to run this site then you would see things from a whole different point of view. How would you like to be hated for just trying to keep people safe?
  8. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I do not usually respond to these threads, but I must say that I do not judge a person, I judge his/her behavior...and the tenant is simple...follow the guidelines, have staff clarify the guidelines, if needed, and treat others with respect...hate me if you wish; I take little of this personally; as I do not know you all, you do not know me...just do me one favor, when you are going to try to rip my hinds in the other direction, remember, with the exception of having to keep SF safe, I will respond by repeating what I said previously...sometimes, I might seem angry...this is cyber and it is hard to differentiate emotions...mostly, I am ill and tired...I might seem distant...I have little time and less fortitude right please, help us...treat others well...treat yourself well...and then maybe I can get some much needed sleep...big hugs, J
  9. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    well... i used to be a moderator. so i know what it's like on the other side of this equation. i know it's hard work. but it doesn't mean i'm going to be silent when i think a mistake is being made.

    also, not all of the moderators are in agreement on this week's "hot" issue either. there is certainly a lot of debate going on between mods behind the scenes, too.

    i just think there should be room for a healthy, civil, and honest discussion. having a discussion is not the same as deliberately stirring things up. the community will be stronger for it.

    as i said, mistakes get made.
  10. *sparkle*

    *sparkle* Staff Alumni

    im not sure what the "hot" issue is this week but how do you know the mods aren't in agreement?! :unsure:

    wayne thank you for posting this thread initially :hug: guidelines and as Sadeyes mentioned - respect for each other... so important... nobody running the site is here to damage or harm... if we can help the majority of people... there are always going to be some who dont like SF as there are any other place... i personally just walk away from what i dont like and stay where i do like... each to their own... but respect for oneself and for others :hug:
  11. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i'm talking about the triggering posts in the rape/abuse forum, and i know because received a PM about it from a mod...

    i don't want to reopen the debate about triggers, so can we agree to let it go? i know where you stand on it, and you know where i stand.

    i just think healthy, respectful debate is a good thing.
  12. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Again this thread has become a free all here to insult other members it is not a rational conversation at all. I deleted the last post very inappropriate. to hve posted I am locking thread seeing you again can not seem to stay on track and follow the rules
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