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the seizures won't stop.

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by undercoverlover, May 27, 2011.

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  1. undercoverlover

    undercoverlover both dead and alive until somebody opens the box

    I just feel like I can't go on anymore. I take 12 pills in the morning and one at night just for epilepsy and depression. I just feel like it's too much to deal with. Anyone know a good way to stop the seizures? I keep getting absence seizures and panic attacks, and I just wish my parents would leave the room so I could do something stupid and destructive to get all the stress out. I've been trying to stop cutting as well, so the stress is even worse. I feel like I'd just rather be dead by tomorrow...I want to stop the seizures, but I want them to get bad to the point where I'd die.
  2. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    that sounds terrible, i'm really sorry you are suffering so much
    i don't know anything about reducing seizures, i know may71 recommends chinese medicine and acupuncture for people who have tried everything western medicine has offered.
    as for stopping cutting, i write affirmations on my arms (where i usually cut) so when i go to cut i have to read nice things about myself (like "you are safe now" or "he can't hurt you anymore"... those are just mine but you could write your own) i use a sharpie.
    just wanted to let you know i read your thread and am sending you a hug

  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    ^ yep
  4. Hey there sweetie.

    I have seizures, too. Grand-Mal (tonic-clonic) but I've had absence seizures as well as Complex Partial ones, too. Its hell. I'm not going to tell you otherwise 'cause you know how devastating it is to not be in control of yourself and to be dependent on a handful of pills two, three or four times a day. Its miserable.

    I don't have any answers for what will stop your seizures... I just want you to know that I've been in that dark place too and that you're not alone. The drugs I take probably won't help your absence seizures. All I can say is that there's lots of treatments out there but unfortunately patience is a necessity. Are you seeing your doctors regularly? Like the ppl above have said, there's also less westernized treatments out there, too. How active are you in your healthcare? Its good to be as 'in charge' as you can be. Remember that this is your body and you have a right to know what each pill is supposed to do and why they want you to take it. Doctors are smart people but they don't know it all. Still, they're one of your best resources out there for treatment of Epilepsy.

    Good for you for trying to stop cutting. That's another battle I understand completely. I was eight years SI-free until I cut last year. I'm back on the wagon though and I'd like to hope that you'll be on that wagon, too. Its stressful as hell though 'cause what you want to do the most, that thing that would take away all your stress, is exactly what you can't do. Journaling and creative writing really helped me get through, though. I'd make up stories and write all about each different character. Do you do any creative writing or journalling at this point?

    I still have seizures and I still struggle with cutting but please know you're not alone. I'm going to bookmark this page, please write back k?

  5. Random

    Random Well-Known Member


    I've had epilepsy for over 20 years. I started taking Depakote right after they started and it controlled them well until a few years ago. I suddenly started having them again every once in a while. Not as bad as I would without the medication but still.

    Lately, they've been getting worse. I have auras all the time. My doctor tells me my Depakote levels are high and wants me to take less of it. It's terrible. I don't know what to tell you. People have no idea. Even people who know you don't really get it what it's like to actually have it. They don't understand the subtleties and nuances that have to be experienced to be understood.

    12 pills is a lot. Being chained to medication sucks even when it works but when it only halfway works or barely helps that's really adding insult to injury.
  6. godsbeloved

    godsbeloved Active Member

  7. Sailor_Saturn

    Sailor_Saturn Active Member

    I have both Grand Mal Seizures and Complex Partial Seizures which were originally misdiagnosed as anxiety (I kept getting this overwhelming sense of fear randomly that I couldn't explain). Anyway, now they are diagnosed as seizures and I'm on Lamotrigine, and I rarely have one.
  8. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Hello. Are you taking this med by itself or as an add on to another epilepsy drug? Does it control both types of seizures by itself? I looked it up and it doesn't look like it's approved to treat grand mals. It would be nice if I could get on another type of med though as I think the Depakote is starting to wear me down.
  9. Sailor_Saturn

    Sailor_Saturn Active Member

    I don't know if it's approved in your area or not. It is in mine, that's why I was prescribed it. If it wasn't, I wouldn't be prescribed it. You need to talk to a neurologist and see what they say.
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