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The Therapy Dilemma

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by CGMAngel, Feb 10, 2013.

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  1. CGMAngel

    CGMAngel SF Supporter

    Just wondering...

    When is enough enough? Over the past 30 years I have seen 12 different doctors/therapists (that I can recall at the moment) for support and assistance with my mental illness, yet at this point in my life I feel lower than ever.

    Now, it would be so easy to play the blame game, and I refuse to do that. There are some wonderful counsellors out there who do a great job and genuinely do care for their clients. I am not going to place responsibility for my mental inferno at their feet (although one or two have been nightmares! Ever had a therapist consistently fall asleep during your sessions? That does wonders for your trust issues. But I digress...).

    I have also tried at least seven anti-depressants/anti-anxiety medications over the years, all of which have had about as much effect on me as eating candy.

    So truly, what is the point of "never giving up"? I know, I know, if you fall (or are knocked) down 100 times, you are still supposed to climb back to your feet for the 101st time. Persistence and tenacity are important, but ultimately I feel all I am left with is....why???

    Why why why?

    Always more questions than answers...and why is that?!!!
  2. Spacer

    Spacer Active Member


    People are supposed to tell us to keep going. That's what society and our nature encourages us to do when other people feel like this. People aren't supposed to say, "Oh go ahead give up, see ya later". No one will ever be able to understand the way this all feels in your own mind and heart, they simply respond the only way they know how. So ultimately peoples opinions or answers to your struggles mean nothing. It's your own view and your own decisions of your current feelings and status that matter. Sounds to me like despite the other people your a fighter whether you realize it or not. 30 years of bullshit is a long time, never mind having to deal with therapists falling asleep in front of you while your rehashing it. It sounds to me like you're stronger than you think.

  3. CGMAngel

    CGMAngel SF Supporter


    Thank you for your kind and thoughtful words. Hope you're having an okay day!
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi there, I have quite a lot of experience with psychiatrists/doctors and therapists. The best advice I can give you regarding the meds is it can take quite some time to find the right combination , for me it took years. The combination I am on right now is working quite well. :) As for therapist falling asleep? what the..? lol that is disgraceful.. I hope you didn't have to fork out big bucks for those! Keep trying and hang in there.. do not give up! :hug:
  5. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Because, if you need to know, you need to ASK!!!

    We are born with our need to know, in order that we might start asking the questions. The tragedy about so many doctors/therapists is that there are very few of them who are prepared to be flat out honest with a soul about the availability of their ultimate purpose/meaning/healing because the way our education system is structured is purely in accord with post-modernist ideology/mathematical and scientific worldviews - and they don't seem able to betray their training.

    I write from personal experience, I know it to be true :)
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