I'm suicidal, and I accept this. If it wasn't for my fear of the unknown, i'd probably be jumping off the nearest cliff. I've recently started a notorious smoking habit because of the stress of being in school, the inability to love, the inability to have lasting friendships and the inability to achieve a more favorable balance in my life. I have an inferiority complex that is taking control of my life. I feel dumber, less intelligent, and less physically appealing to everyone else. The effexor drug doesn't seem to be working, so maybe I have to up my dose. I don't know why I am sharing this, but I guess we are all in the same boat.