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the truth....

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It's nice to think that way.

But I heard that bullies are often those that have very high self-esteem and think very highly of themselves. Maybe this study was wrong. But the traditional view in this thread is not always right, I am certain. Although there are always exceptions.


Well-Known Member
dropmealine, you're on the dot! My verbal harassers are severely popular, superficial, and I doubt it would be a wrong assumption to say that some of them are in sports.
I know, though, that people like this are vulnerable without their 'Great Wall' of friends.
Are you sure they're feeling as good as you think? Ask yourself this, why would someone who's perfectly secure and happy need to attack others? Perhaps you have much more in common with these bullies than you realize.
Sorry if I come across as pedantic, or if I'm stating the obvious here. :-o

Oh well, it can't hurt.

I tend to think of bullies as those who externalize stress (take it out on others) while depressed and anxious people internalize the stress (take it out on ourselves). In both examples, the personalities indicate an unhealthy lifestyle in some way. The victims aren't receiving enough love, and may have painful relations with peers and family in some cases, or simply lack enough good friends, or lack friends altogether. There are other sources of stress as well, but it is not uncommon for most people to experience some degree of either anger/ bullying others, or depression/ anxiety.

Those who are truly content and happy (who may also be popular socially) who aren't depressed and who are actually nice to others are probably the most mentally healthy. It sometimes seems uncommon to find these people (especially in HS) due to the destructive social environments.. namely, the fact that the gov't feels the need to force a bunch of adolescents from different family backgrounds and cultures all under the same roof every day by law. Considering the fact that the majority of the population has no idea how to raise kids - it's not exactly the most well thought-out system in regards to a collective institution advocating the value of learning and cooperation.

Apologies for dragging this out, but it had to be said. I can't help myself I suppose. :\ Now, I will clarify that a lot of good progress is happening in education on a daily basis, but not nearly enough. The U.S. specifically is ranked quite low on the top 100 best educational systems of developed nations worldwide. Coupled with the fact that we're oh.. say.. the WEALTHIEST nation in the world, is not somewhat disturbing? Before I get criticized here, yes I have thought out many solutions to the problem, and I'm not going to start on that here, for fear of going off-topic (plus, I don't want anyone to fall asleep on their computer keyboards ;)) so I'll just conclude this by saying - Hang in there, bullies and separation of cliques are a temporary problem that will be practically non-existent by college, depending on location. If it is still a problem for you, you're hanging out with the wrong crowd. I made that mistake for many years myself.
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Well-Known Member
You guys are forgeting the true sadists out there. It has nothing to do with self esteem, they just get off on other peoples pain. I think that's how a lot of bullies are.
Well, bullying is sadistic behavior after all.. it all depends on how sadistic one has to be before we define them as a true sadist.

Anyway. Either you believe someone can be born sadistic, or you believe they develop the sadistic behavior from others and their environment.. or perhaps some combination requiring the right ingredients from the two.

I don't think people are born naturally as sadists. I'm not saying it's necessarily true, just my opinion on the matter.

Humans do have the primal instincts in them for survival, but it is when this will to survive gets corrupted through an improper upbringing that it can turn humans into weapons against others. I believe it's a sickness, not the kind we can see physically, but one that feasts upon the human mind nonetheless.
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