This is the issue. I am sexually attracted to men and women, but have only really ever been emotionally attracted to girls. All of my true and lasting crushes have been on girls. A lot of my friends know that I am at least bisexual, but for the most part I don't like telling people--because it's not their fucking business. Not to mention, I often simply feel objectified when I tell people I'm attracted to girls. I've only ever had one short, tumultuous relationship with a boy. Being attracted to girls has only caused me pain and angst. I have some hope that when I'm older, it'll be easier to meet more mature girls that are actually out. This might still be an issue, but for now, it hurts that I can't control my feelings. I am afraid I'm falling for another one of my friends. She's amazing, and even though I've spent five days away from her, she was the only one I could think about. This would all be okay, but now guys are starting to ask me out and I can't handle it. I just get anxious thinking about how there are these guys hitting on me, I like my friend that's a straight girl (AS HARD AS I TRY TO CRUSH THOSE FEELINGS), and that overall my love life has been mostly unrequited crushes. I am just anxious, anxious, anxious, and I can't control it. It makes me want to die, sometimes, honestly.