Really thinking about suicide tomorrow... have a plan & supplies. Tonight, I wrote out my wishes as far as burial & made provision for my cat. I was working on a project w/ someone...finished my part & got it all together for her. I have a therapy appointment tomorrow. I want to be honest but don't think I can. I think I want help but yet I want to die. Last week, I decided to not make any more committments b/c I'd be free then to end it. I'm scared...feel like I've lost control & this urge has taken over. It's all I can think about.