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The woman I loved

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I'm going to regret this, but I can't keep everything inside any longer.

Around 2 and a half years ago I met a woman who has since been the most important thing in my life. I fell in love instantly, and the better I got to know her the deeper I fell in love. I wont bore everyone with the details, though I remember almost everything. Needless to say I'm not with her any more. For a long time I thought she must hate me, she may have. But now I don't think she hates me. I think she might love me just as much as I love her. And I don't know which hurts most. I've tried to forget her and I've tried to move on, but I can't. I remember the times she was here in this very room with me, the way she'd look at me sometimes and I'd know she loved me, the way she'd gently kiss me or wrap her arms round me when I was upset. I miss turning over in the night and finding her warm body there and cuddling up to her, and hearing her sigh in her sleep when she felt me next to her. I miss waking up next to her and kissing down her back to wake her up. I miss her laugh, the way she smells, the way her body feels, the colour of her eyes. I've never met anyone with eyes like hers, I could just gaze into them for hours. She was the most beautiful woman in the world to me, I don't think I told her that enough. I always told her I loved her, but I never showed her by getting help with my damn depression. And that's what ultimately drove her away. Now I am getting help, and I really feel like if I keep this up I will get better. And there's still a tiny glimer of hope that's it not too late with her, but I doubt it. There's so many things I wanted to tell her, so many places I wanted to show her. Now I'd give anything just tell her one more time that I love her
Hun you still could tell her you love her, its not too late, write down who you feel and send it to her. Show her your still in love with her. You shouldn't regret this at all.

I dunno what else to say except you should try tell her.

*sending you big hugs*
mal go for it guy. if you don't you'll regret it. please just go for it. demonstrate to her, tell her, show her how much you love her. maybe you shouldn't just be so content (for the lack of better words) to let it stop. go for it guy. just GO FOR IT!!!! :smile:


Staff Alumni
Go for it Mal, Do you want to end like me, at my age? No? Didnt think so...you can do it mate, I know you can!, I really hope it works out for you ;)
I've thought about it, but I always worry that if I tell her how I feel it'll make things worse. I don't wanna bring up all that hurt for her again, but I will if I tell her. Maybe it's all she's waiting to hear, and telling her I love her is what I should do. But I can't take that risk. The potential it has to cause her and me pain is just too great. I need to keep how I feel inside
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