Hi, I just found this forum while searching on the net. I have a question I'd like to ask because it seems to me that no one, in any suicide help forum or otherwise has been able to answer. Let me give a short background first... I could write pages and pages to explain who I am and what my life has been like, but for now I don't think that's necessary. I just want to tell you that I am 28 years old and am unable to hold down a job for physical and emotional reasons. I have severe migraine headaches that I have been seeking treatment for for six years, and nothing other than narcotic type medications has ever been able to help them. (Please don't answer by writing "You should try _______ (fill in the blank)" because whatever you can think of, believe me, I have tried already and it doesn't work.) Of course, no doctor will prescribe me the medications that work because they are afraid I will become addicted, so I live in pain. I injured my knee several years ago, and now it is so bad that if I stand for more than ten minutes I am in very bad pain, and when I walk I twist it constantly, making it worse. I have depression as well, and no meds have been able to help that either. I've been seeing a psychiatrist for three years, and have tried therapy with bad results. I have anxiety, and the meds for that just knock me out and put me to sleep. My teeth are killing me. I have 13 cavities and one tooth that needs to be extracted, but I can't afford to have any of it fixed. I need money badly. If I can't find a way to make it, I will lose my apartment and everything I own. My husband left me (I was a housewife), and for the past three years my parents have been supporting me. They can't and/or won't give me any more money. They will stop sending it in May. They have offered for me to live with them, but, to me, that would be worse than a psycho ward. I love my parents, as long as they are a thousand miles away from me. (I live in Florida and they live in Maryland.) My point is that if I lose this apartment, I will lose my mind completely. There is nowhere else for me to go, and no way to support myself. I HAVE to be able to support myself, but just the thought of getting a job sends me into uncontrollable panic attacks. But if I have to chose between living with my parents, living on the street, or dying; I would pick dying - hence the reason I am here. I don't have low self esteem or anything like that, I am just unable to function in the world, and yet I need my own place, my things, my pets (cat, turtles, and fish), and my freedom to stay sane and alive. So I come to my question: what if you want to kill yourself because of finanical reasons? No helpline or shrink can get your bills paid. No medications can keep you from getting evicted. Prayer does not make God send a check to your mailbox. (And, yes, I have tried all those things.) You have to have what the state considers a "serious" medical problem before they will help, and even then it can take years to get aid, and everyone I have talked to says that they always deny your first claim and you have to get a lawyer and appeal it. I don't have time for any of that and certainly no money for a lawyer. Narcotic pain medications could definatly help enough for me to be able to get a job, but the doctors say I am "too young" to be prescribed those medications; like only older people deserve to be pain-free. I could easily work from home on my computer, but I have searched and searched for a way to do this, and all I've found are scams trying to take more of the money I don't have. They prey on desperate people like me. Any legitamate way to make money from home requires a good deal of time AND start-up capital, neither of which I have. So what can I do other than die? People always say "money is the root of all evil", but they have it backwards. LACK of money is the root of all evil. People also say there is no such words as "can't", but I know there is. "Can't" is when you are faced with a choice to do something or die, and you would pick die. Like if someone said "Grow three feet taller or you will die", you will die because you CAN'T grow three feet taller. It is the same for me, I can't work and I can't lose my apartment... so what else CAN I do? Does anyone have an answer?