It comes like a darkness sucking in the back of my neck.. my ears pop.. my eyes vacate.. an emptiness grows and grows inside of me. I can feel it sometimes days before its full force. A storm that's coming.. no matter what. For days or sometimes weeks I'm a zombie. Propped up only by my need to work, to eat, to sleep.. animal function. All the time I'm someone else.. no who they think I am.. not who I was.. not who I'm expected to be. It devastates me. Every minute seems like an hour. This endless ticking.. this endless living.. for nothing.. for no one.. I can't anymore. I can't anymore... I CAN'T ANYMORE! LEAVE ME ALONE BREATH LIFE LIVING WORLD!!!!!!!! I'm DEAD already! WHY PRETEND ANY LONGER?