There you were again

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by byebyebeautiful, Jan 11, 2009.

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  1. byebyebeautiful

    byebyebeautiful Account Closed

    Ready to hold me still, until the time came, and I was gone.
    Ready to free me, save me, love me, hold me, Take me away.
    But you failed, I didn't die, I am still living, bleeding, breathing.
    You couldn't hold me still, for my breath to stop, till I passed out.
    You was not strong enough, to make me happy, free me from hell.
    You tried, and you failed, when will you try again, tonight, tomorrow?
    Next Saturday, or Sunday, or will it be a while, to give you confidence?
    You know I cannot do it alone, and you know I badly want to go, but fail.

    **miltipul personality suicide attp**
     
  2. kenny

    kenny Well-Known Member

    Hey Holly,

    :arms: am always here for you.
     
  3. pensive1981

    pensive1981 Well-Known Member

    Hang in there. Support.
     
  4. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    What's up? :hug:
     
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Hold on hun. :hug:
     
  6. byebyebeautiful

    byebyebeautiful Account Closed

    I have nothing to hold on for. I'm loosing everything, and I am useless. :( worthless. Pathetic. :(
     
  7. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Invisible Tears,
    You have to dig down deep and find that inner strength. I also am extremely suicidal but when I get up in the mornings I tell my thoughts out loud that it isn't happening today. I use positive self talk to get me going in the mornings. It can be anything. Like I am going to get up and cook a good breakfast. After breakfast I think I will step outside and just breath in some fresh air.
    Those are just two examples. Like I said you can use anything that will be positive to get you on the right track first thing in the morning. You can also use visualization- picture yourself somewhere beautiful and sereene and quiet. Also use controlled breathing while you are picturing a place in your mind.
    It might sound corny but those are coping skills from therapy. There are several others but those are the ones I use. The positive self talk works the best!! I hope you find the strength to hang on. You will make a lot of friends here!! You can PM me anytime, I am on line all different times aday and night. I don't sleep much..Take Care!!~Joseph~
    P.S. If you want my MSN address just ask and I will give it to you!!!
     
  8. byebyebeautiful

    byebyebeautiful Account Closed

    Yeah, but it isnt always me who tries to kill me. I tried possitive talk, but it got me nowhere. made me worse when things went wrong, if I go without an expectation i cant get hurt. I used those skills when i first went into therapy. it helped at the time, but I wasnt as bad as i am now, and picturing it it doesnt help. makes me feel like ive lost.
    I have friends here, but none close to me in my real life. :(
    pm me add my msn.. if its the right one, or pm me urs.
     
  9. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    be strong holly, even though i am far away i am thinking of you.
    everything may look awful in your life right now but thats because all the nagatives out weigh the positives, give yourself time hun.
    listen to the support offered here and realise you are not worthless, pathetic etc etc.

    take care

    andy
     
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