These words

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by forlorn, Mar 26, 2010.

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  1. forlorn

    forlorn Staff Alumni

    I was acting the lad but the lad wasnt me...
    acting the fool, the flower and the honey bee...
    Kisses her lips and taking whats mine..
    forgetting her problems..
    when lost in mine.

    What happened to the words I should of should..
    What happened to the things I should of done..
    Now im just another..
    Now I am long gone..
    the words I should of said..
    cut me to the bone..
    lost without a home..
    are the words I should of said.




    Just a song I just wrote, its sad but true :(
     
  2. Dubstepper

    Dubstepper Staff Alumni

    i like it, forlorn.. it resembles a real meaning.. keep writing! seriously its nice
     
  3. forlorn

    forlorn Staff Alumni

    its words i should of said and not should of should of but i bet you guessed. Ive actually changed this now and have a good tune to it. working on verses and playing it on guitar. Its a good release and the only one I can find.
     
  4. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    That was lovely. The first stanza's the best in my opinion. I especially like the line, "I was acting the lad but the lad wasnt me...
    acting the fool, the flower and the honey bee...".

    It's hard to say, but I view it to mean that he feels that he's been self-absorbed, that he's the entire act (like the only one that's playing the parts).

    A sad poem, and relatable too.
     
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are a wonderful writer keep going
     
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