My boyfriend broke my nose two months ago and I don't know how to get over it. I keep seeing his forehead coming right towards me sometimes (flashback). Other times, I am just really sensitive and scared about my nose getting hit. I guess the telling part of this is, is that this is not the worse thing he has done. I know people would look down on me, call me dumb or tell me I'm asking for it but I feel as though I need to help him through this. I do not consider myself to be greatly unintelligent, I have some goals for myself. I am getting ready for graduate school but it feels like I have no more drive to go on, there's no possible way I could make anything out of myself. This is an absurdly sick relationship but I love him so much, apparently much more than he could love me. I guess I am just wondering how long can I keep having these flashbacks. What really hurts sometimes more than the obvious pain is that he knows my story and where I have come from. That my father sexually abused me and I had to protect my little sister as best as I could for so long, but I couldn't always protect her. I survived childhood cancer that took away my ability to have children, not that I really feel like having them anyway. I am actually a pretty upbeat person, always joking but that's the only side I want people to see. It hurts that he knows these horrific things I have been through but he contributes to them anyway. I have an extremely horrible time reaching out to people but I figured what the hey, I'm up and I am horribly depressed. Even if no one listens, it feels somewhat better to see it in writing.