Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Zero2Zero, Aug 10, 2016.
How do things get better? How do you know things get better?
Will you pay my bills for me?
Hi Zero and welcome to SF. No we wont pay your bills for you, we are all broke as well [excuse the pun] but maybe we can find ways to help you pay your bills? You never know, maybe today is your lucky day?
So what brings you to SF? Maybe you could use the My Story thread in the forum to tell us more about yourself? That way, it helps us all identify ways in which we might help and support you.
I know you are in so much pain, Zero2Zero and far be it from me to say I know how you feel. I was writing to you a minute ago, must have been a different forum, since I'm still not sure how this stuff works. But we were talking about your situation and it is about as tough as anyone could stand. I humble myself to you, and if we were talking, I wouldn't make eye contact, because I do not deserve to say that any pain I know equals your pain. I felt your above two questions go through me. How do we know things will get better? Will we pay your bills for you? I liked what SinisterKid says. You ought to read his story. It's tough. But I would only reply, and quietly, as I don't deserve to challenge anything at all that you've said. I would only say, How does a person know that things will NOT get better? I can say one thing that's in common, that being that most of us here have wished we hadn't been born, and incredible tragedies have destroyed many of our lives forever. But I would say this: When we come to the conclusion that death is of more value than life (and we've all, me included, at times done the math that way), we have just walked right into the trap in logic called a "logical fallacy" and "insufficient evidence".
The key to the correct answer is OPTIONS.
With death, there is only one option, and after that, no more chances.
With life, the options are literally infinite.
We may think (and I get very angry about this when it happens to me) "I don't wanna hear this crap. My life has NO options."
Well, really? And how do I know that? I don't know that unless I can see the future.
But I don't need the future to see that death is the end of ALL options.
What everyone needs, even cowboys in the movies near the edge of a cliff on a deranged horse, we need OPTIONS, because only with options, is there hope.
My therapist is trying to get this teaching thru my head and sometimes I agree, but when I'm super down, I don't care what he says. I wanna go, "shut up."
But he says that when we let our feelings control our choices, we will not see 20/20. Our vision, our guidance system will be effed up because feelings need glasses. They lie to us! Feelings lie!
But logic and truth NEVER LIE. It's MATH. It runs the universe.
So, if we say shut up to our feelings, because they lie, and look at it with LOGIC because most of us here, you included are wayyyyyy more intelligent than average, as you will learn. If we shut up the lies from our feelings, lies that conclude that death is of more value than life, then we are being STUPID.
If we follow logic, which we don't make up, but we find. We FIND it in nature, if we follow logic and see that LIFE has more options than death, then we hang the hell on.
And we can be hanging off the edge of a fricking torn up boat in a storm and a shark just took our leg, but logic will tell us there are still OPTIONS.
If the shark eats us, and we die, no more options. If i play poker, I can maybe win if I have options, but when I'm out of chips, out of options, I'm gonna lose.
I hope I explained that well enough, as I am way too talky.
I also speak to you with an unusual amount of respect. I respect you and would not speak to you any way but with my eyes down, and humbly, because you are in a jam and a half. But even with all that respect, I hope you will consider this idea about options.
The saying in the US that "Sh*t happens." Yeah. It does. But what does "sh*t mean there? It can mean like this "Oh the best sh*t just happened to me!" And sometimes that sh*t is so great that we could never have ever imagined it would happen and fix everything.
So how do we know things will get better? We don't.
But we also don't know that they won't.
Stay with us, if I may ask you with great respect for your difficulties.