Things not to say.

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Tara, May 28, 2007.

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  1. Tara

    Tara Guest

    Hey all, i just came across this and thought it'd come in very handy to me. im thinking about showing/giving this to my family/friends.

    Thought you may want to do the same:

    The worst things you can say to someone thats depressed; (theres 98 here lol) pasted from incase anyone wants to visit the site.

    I've coloured the ones i think apply most to me, you can do the same if you like or just copy and print out them!

    Hope they help :biggrin:

    1. "What's *your* problem?"

    2. "Will you stop that constant whining? What makes you think that anyones cares?"

    3. "Have you gotten tired yet of all this me-me stuff?"

    4. "But it's all in your mind" (yea, in a way it is, but not how this is usually spoken)

    5. "I thought you were stronger than that."

    6. "No One ever said life was fair."

    7. "As you get stronger you won't have to wallow in it as much."

    8. "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."

    9. "Do you feel better now?" (Usually said following a five minute conversation in which the speaker has asked "what's wrong?" and "would you like to talk about it?" with the best of intentions, but absolutely no understanding of depression as anything but an irrational sadness.)

    10. "Why don't you just grow up?"

    11. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself."

    12. "There are alot of people worse off than you!"

    13. "You have it so good, why aren't you happy?"

    14. "It's a beautiful day!"

    15. "You have so many things to be thankful for, why are you depressed!"

    16. "What do you have to be depressed about?"

    17. "Happiness is a choice"

    18. "You think *you've* got problems..."

    19. "Well at least it's not that bad."

    20. "Maybe you should take vitamins for your stress."

    21. "There is always somebody worse off than you are."

    22. "Lighten up!"

    23. "You should get off all those pills." << :mad::mad::mad:!!

    24. "You are what you think."

    25. "Cheer up!"

    26. "You're always feeling sorry for yourself."

    27. "Why can't you just be normal?"

    28. "Things aren't *that* bad, are they?"

    29. "Have you been praying/reading the Bible?"

    30. "You brought it on yourself"

    31. "You need to get out more."

    32. "We have to get together some time." (Yeah, Right!)

    33. "Get a grip!"

    34. "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."

    35. "Take a hot bath. That's what I always do when I'm upset."

    36. "Well, everyone gets depressed sometimes!"

    37. "Get a job!"

    38. "Smile and the world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone."

    39. "You don't *look* Depressed!"

    40. "You're so selfish!"

    41. "You never think of anyone, but yourself!"

    42. "Have you got PMS?"

    43. "You'll be a better person, because of it!"

    44. "You're just looking for attention."

    45. "Everybody has a bad day now and then."

    46. "You should buy nicer clothes to wear."

    47. "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."

    48. "A person your age should be having the time of your life."

    50. "The only one you're hurting is yourself."

    51. "You can do anything you want if you just set your mind to it."

    52. "This is a place of BUSINESS, not a HOSPITAL" --> after confiding to supervisor about my depression.

    53. "Depression is a symptom of your sin against God."

    54. "You can make the choice for depression and its effects, or against depression, it's all in YOUR hands."

    55. "Get off your rear and do something." -or- "Just do it!"

    56. "Why should I care?"

    57. "Snap out of it, will you?"

    58. "You *want* to feel this way."

    59. "You have no reason to feel this way."

    60. "Its your own fault."

    61. "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."

    62. "You're always worried about *your* problems."

    63. "Your problems aren't that big."

    64. "What are you worried about? You should be fine."

    65. "Just don't think about it."

    66. "Go Away."

    67. "You don't have the ability to do it."

    68. "Just wait a few weeks, it'll be over soon."

    69. "Go out and have some fun!"

    70. "You're making me depressed as well..."

    71. "I just want to help you."

    72. "The world out there is not that bad..."

    73. "Just try a little harder!"

    74. "Believe me, I know how you feel. I was depressed once for several days."

    75. "You need a boy/girl-friend."

    76. "You need a hobby."

    77. "Just pull yourself together"

    78. "You'd feel better if you went to church"

    79. "I think your depression is a way of punishing us."

    80. "Sh*t or get off the pot."

    81. "So, you're depressed. Aren't you always?"

    82. "What you need is some real tragedy in your life to give you perspective."

    83. "You're a writer, aren't you? Just think of all the good material you're getting out of this." (actually this is when I won't write..)

    84. "Have you tried camomile tea?"

    85. "You will be ok, just hang in there, it will pass.""This too shall pass."-Ann Landers

    86. "Oh, perk up!"

    87. "Try not being so depressed."

    88. "Quit whining. Go out and help people and you won't have time to brood..."

    89. "Go out and get some fresh air... that always makes me feel better."

    90. "You have to take up your bed and carry on."

    91. "Why don't you give up going to those quacks (iedoctors) and throw out those pills, then you'll feel better." (my personal favorite)

    92. "Well, we all have our cross to bear."

    93. "You should join band or chorus or something. That way you won't be thinking about yourself so much."

    94. "You change your mind."

    95. "You're useless."

    96. "Nobody is responsible for your depression."

    97. "You don't like feeling that way? So, Change it!" (how I wish it was that simple)

    98. "Your not depressed, your just crazy"

    i've one too add
    99. You're not depressed you're lazy! << thanks "FRIEND"

    feel free to add on some more!
  2. Pneuma

    Pneuma Guest

    I've heard more than half of these and a couple past therapists have even told me.

    20. "Maybe you should take vitamins for your stress."
    76. "You need a hobby."
    87. "Try not being so depressed."
    were kinda funny, though.
  3. Syd

    Syd Guest

    I'll have to remember to avoid saying this to depressed people. :unsure:

    I didn't see any problems with this one.

    I laughed.

    WTF. :blink:
  4. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    I've heard loads of those. :rolleyes:
  5. Tara

    Tara Guest

    "It's a beautiful day!"

    i think thats like "you shouldnt feel crap its a lovely day, get out! do something".....sometimes days like that make me feel worse, like as if the worlds saying "hahahaha, we're all happy and having fun, look at you, u sad cow" it makes my mum think that just because its sunny i should be out :rolleyes: what ev. dont care what the weathers like if i wanna be sad i'll be sad LOL
  6. goingmobile

    goingmobile Active Member

    Some of those are legitimate?
  7. Tara

    Tara Guest

    im guessing the girl that made that yahoo site has had them said to her? so i guess so!
  8. goingmobile

    goingmobile Active Member

    no i mean- legitimate was the wrong word. Some of them I don't see as things to avoid saying... nevermind.
  9. Pneuma

    Pneuma Guest

    Was my favorite! :laugh:

    <edit> I wanna see it on a greeting card some day!
    Last edited: May 28, 2007
  10. Tara

    Tara Guest

    ohh lol i know.

    guess it depends on the person: personality/mood

    somedays you can say to me "Stop feeling sorry for yourself." and i'd be :dry: okay *laugh* and other days i'd burst out crying
  11. Just_a_guy

    Just_a_guy Well-Known Member

    Hey! Vitamins do help! :)
  12. Tara

    Tara Guest

    really? which ones? i want! :D
  13. Pneuma

    Pneuma Guest

    Where is my head at these days! please delete this post
  14. Pneuma

    Pneuma Guest

    Whoops! please delete this
  15. Tara

    Tara Guest

    im confused lol
  16. Pneuma

    Pneuma Guest

    Yay so am I! :laugh:
  17. cassandra

    cassandra Anitiquities Friend

    Oh dear. Right before I read this I mentioned a bath as self-soothing in another thread.
  18. ybt

    ybt Guest

    "go run in front of a truck" :p
  19. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    ive heard a lot of them and also

    ''you're irritating me now''
    ''your miserable side depresses me''
  20. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Sometimes I can't believe how dense some people can be. Obviously the poeple that say these kinds of things have never been there. More power to them. i hope they never have to experience the joys of depression. :dry:
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