Things seem insignificant when you have much larger problems to deal with

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by justMe7, Mar 16, 2012.

  1. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    Yeah... So I said that when I was talking to someone. And i stopped. Lifes really bad tbh, well ok my lifes perfect, ok idk actually. Who knows, well I do but fuck it. The point was, for one moment I remembered what it could feel like to care about a flower peddle, or a snow flake, or a fragrance. .. Idk was nice. Ill forget.. im always forgetting and replacing and ... but it was a real moment that I could feel that was quite away, but it was like being in a big dark void and all of a sudden a scent flowing in. was nice. Dont want to forget.. I hate forgetting feelings and covering them with .. crap
     
  2. scarlettdrknss

    scarlettdrknss Well-Known Member

    i know exactly how that feels like... and i used to enjoy those moments, trying to chain them to my heart to keep me happy, but i guess i just fell back into the void painfully and couldn't protect that feeling, so it hurt even more when i lost it and ever since i just keep ignoring... good and bad... it seems like everything is just a point a view.
     
  3. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    I hope it's not. What I loved about it was that it was a moment that was beyond my senses. Where I guess I sorta felt humbled by what I was experiencing. Idk.. I try to hold onto that feeling, something that's more than me, where a snow flake is anything and everything, part of everything.. or just a snow flake among many. Sigh.. I try not to think about those feelings tbh. Feelings are important to me and very rare atm, it's nice when I feel one, I kinda hope that im honest with how I feel and think, that way, I can just feel, instead of caging that moment with my mind. :) It's nice though, cause moments like those can never be caged by your mind. I think the minds or part of the perception, the rest is how it can feel through that point of view. Obviously that point of view is limited to your own head, but those moments.. idk more than my mind can dream of dreaming up :) It's nice when a warm gush flows through you sometimes. Rejuventating to all those moments ive chained to the floor with my mind with completely rational logic. Lets me know theres more than me, and perhaps if I wake myself up just right...

    ill get fucked by some crazy fucking thing :D would be no fun otherwise :) I wonder what it feels like to ... nm
    Idk.. I feel clenched all the time tbh, like im sorta lost in something(erhm not lost but .) and things are collapsing around me and I would do something about it, if I was ...
    Yeah .. fucking bollocks sometimes life is. All it takes is one good thing to be strong enough, atleast to inspire yourself to raise those parts that have collapsed. Kinda my only hope tbh. So much has whittled down to ...
    I keep talking sorry. Well.. Im not really :) You know how it goes.. you try to deal with something by .. doing nothing at all.. ug. This confuses the fuck out of me.
     
  4. scarlettdrknss

    scarlettdrknss Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean. To relish in just the feeling, not having to think about it or anything but just leave it at the feeling. And it is rare. I had a game yesterday and it gave me this awesome adrenaline rush. I didn't really think at all. But at night it reversed. What had been awesome turned into the worst feeling of restlessness of all so that i couldn't sleep. And that a night before an exam. It's like with every low comes a high just the other way around. But I shouldn't be putting you down like this xP enjoy it =]
    Exactly, you want the bad and the good but you don't know what's right and what's wrong and why and you feel pulled both ways, which is why you feel lost or torn. I hate that feeling. And in one way you get used to living that way but on the other hand it's always torturing you.