A very hard choice to make, but in the end the pain has to stop. Lost faith in friends, family and specially doctors. The pain never goes away and would be nice to be pain free even for a few hours. Still doctors are good for one thing. Giving me loads of Tricyclic and dangerous pain killers. I think I becoming a sociopath. Hate being round people and tell people what they want to hear, rather than the truth. I am sorry for the people I have hurt and for having to post a message on this site, when the professionals should be helping me. NHS (UK National Health Service) waste of F!"**ing space.