I am suicidal and depressed. Every second of my life literally I wish I was in a different place or even better I wish I was dead. I am 34 in college, but I am thinking about leaving everything and some how just going on somekind of missionary work to another country. Maybe if I just leave and go somewhere else I can escape my depression and depressive enviroment. I dont know, what do you think. If I make it to another birthday it will be a miracle.