This has been a really bad year.

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by carebear32, Nov 16, 2012.

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  1. carebear32

    carebear32 Well-Known Member

    I was hospitalized twice this year due to attempted suicides. I think I now know why things went downhill for me this year. 20 years ago this year I learned about what sexual abuse was. Although my heart sank at coming to the realization that it was happening to me, I went into a state of denial. To a degree I still don't want to believe that it happened. How do you get over something you have a really difficult time coming to terms with?
     
  2. FrainBart

    FrainBart Staff Alumni

    I think its best to take these things in very little steps, "getting over " it, or healing, will take a bit of time. Admitting/accepting that it has happened is the best way to make steps forward. Understanding what happened will also help.

    Perhaps writing a letter (but not posting it) to the person who abused you can really help get out feelings and emotions that you are really struggling and can help you understand how and why you are feeling the way you are feeling.

    But most importantly you need to take it slowly... because nothing will be healed over night... it will take time :hug: You are more than welcome to send me a pm if you ever need someone to talk to :hug:
     
  3. carebear32

    carebear32 Well-Known Member

    My therapist asked me on Friday why it is that I am still so haunted by the man who sexually abused me as a child. It didn't come to mind during my session, but sort of has been bugging me all of today. 2 years before the abuse started I lived in England with my family. I'm angry with my parents, because if we'd just stayed in England instead of coming back to South Africa that could have been prevented. I can't be angry at them for the abuse, as that was my fault. I take responsibility for allowing it to happen and not having the guts to stop it. Living with my grandmother doesn't help to much at the moment.
     
  4. Mayflower7

    Mayflower7 Banned Member

    Hi CareBear,
    I discovered last year, that I had been sexually abused and still are 35 years. I simply did not remember, had signs I didn't recognise in myself! I am devastated as thought my family loved me. It appears nobody ever reported so like yourself I am so very angry at everybody. These people help child abuse and it really angers me, I currently have a stalker calling me " abusers" as my abuser put images of me being abused on my devices. I need help like you and hope other admins get this stalker admin banned for life from the Internet!
    I hope sweetheart in time you find help, and this trauma you suffered lessons and you are able to enjoy your life again.
    You did nothing wrong, and it's not your fault it is the abusers they are evil people. Report him to the police/FBI so he goes to prison then!
    Take Care
    Kate
     
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    NONE of it was your fault or your responsibility ok you were a CHILD powerless All the fault lies withthe abuser hun ok get that right NONE of the abuse was your fault never hun
    As a child our power was taken away so please hun the fault is all the abuser hugs
     
  6. carebear32

    carebear32 Well-Known Member

    Hi Kate,

    To get back to what you said about pressing charges against my abuser, I can't do that, it's not an option because he died almost 12 years ago. I guess what frustrates and angers me is I have no vindication now, I was never believed by my family and so I needed him to admit it to let my family that I was telling the truth. He took the truth with him. I still hate him even though he's gone.
     
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