this is my story...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by MokujinX, Sep 10, 2007.

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  1. MokujinX

    MokujinX New Member

    I'm Martin...
    I'm 19 years old and I've fucked up my life...
    I don't know if it's depression, but it feels like it.. I just hate myself more than anyone should.. I've been unemployed after dropping out of college for a while now, pushing myself through the system..
    And every time I look in the mirror I wanna put a knife in it...
    I've talked to the doctor, and I've put things together to try and salvage myself but..
    The only thing that fills my head nowadays is death...
    A filthy masochism... and a desperate need to change it...
    I don't know why I'm posting this, but if anyone is out there who can talk to me right now, please do...
  2. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    :hug: Are you in therapy, or have you talked to anyone about the way you're feeling?
  3. MokujinX

    MokujinX New Member

    i'm getting some, it's just assessment stuff though
    i dunno what'll come of it
    i've talked to a few people, but i dunno, i think i need anti-depressants or something
  4. chasing_dreams

    chasing_dreams Well-Known Member

    Hi Martin, and welcome to the forum.

    It's great that been to see a doctor about the way you've been feeling - have you talked them about possible options for you in terms of meds? You've made the first step in helping yourself to feel better, and I hope they find something that really works for you soon.

    You're only 19, and you definitely haven't fucked up your life at all - concentrate on you first, and (with the help of your doctor or therapist) getting yourself better and into a position where you can think about going back to college or applying for jobs you want to do.

    If you ever want to talk about anything you can PM me any time :smile:
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