This is really hard to write about

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by sadhart, Mar 15, 2015.

  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I went to high school during the columbine shooting. I don't mean that I was there...I went to school in stone mountain Georgia at the time. But what I dealt with is a bunch of narrow minded bullshit from it. Apparently, only "quiet" people like me are likely to shoot up a place like those two guys did and apparently, before the columbine shootings high schools every where were peaceful non violent places where everyone was nice and got along with one another. BULL.SHIT.

    I know that I am being selfish for not thinking of the victims of that shooting, but this thread isn't about hem, this is about people like me who were scapegoated by people because the actual killers weren't around to face justice. Not only would I never do something horrific like that, but the people who judged and labeled me...the "normal" students and teachers....had more in common with the two asshole shooters that did this than I ever did. It hurt when people would look at me and joke how I looked like the type who would do something like that. Joking about it was hurtful enough...it was the ones who seriously thought that though that really hurt. it didn't make me want to shoot up a school.....it made me want to end my own damn life.

    I'm sorry for bringing up such a random topic, but this has been one of the things that has been bothering me all day. I probably didn;t explain all this right, but I have to go now. Sorry for rambling.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am sorry people judge you without ever getting to know you they are the ignorant ones hun i know it is hard to ignore their words but try ok
     
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I can relate. I really can. High school was hell for me, I remember one teacher always said ''it's always the ones you'd least expect, always the quiet ones'' she didn't particularly say what she was talking about though, she just said it randomly. None of my teachers even attempted to stop my bullying and a teacher called me naive,gullible and on another planet. I changed schools when I was just 12 because of bullying then got bullied worse at my second school. So I threw the towel in and said fuck this, i'm leaving.

    It's okay to talk about how you feel and how you can relate to others. I hope you can one day put this all behind you and start a new leaf. Your voice is being heard.
     
  4. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm sorry people made such generalizations about "quiet people." Many of us are "reserved/quiet" and would never be violent towards others.

    I think you have a good head on your shoulders because you can see that they were looking for a place to let out their feelings/anger and they blamed everyone who is quiet, said all quiet people are the same. And it's not true. Deep down, they probably knew that, too, or most of them did. People can be thoughtlessly unkind. :arms: I'm sorry you were labeled so wrongly.

    I'm glad you are you. I hope that as life moves along for you, you are able to show people who you are so they don't pre-judge you or anyone else anymore. Being quiet or reserved is nothing more than a "communication style". If we turn the tables, we could say that really outgoing people are selfishly attention seeking - "look at me, see me, I'm here!" But in reality, being outgoing is also simply a communication style.

    I hope you don't let the jerks get you down. Thankfully you are not dealing with those people anymore. :)
     
  5. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Thank you for the replies. Shortly after i shared this, I went to bible study at this church and their is this guy there who is loud and talks too much. He has constantly bothered me because I usually don't talk...certainly not as much as he does. Before the bible study, there was just him and girl and myself in the room at the time and he was talking to her. I was writing in my journal when he started saying how I was probably writing about them. I found that anoying....talking about me as if I am not there. I tried to ignore him until he said that it's the quiet ones you have to look out for. That was when i finally spoke up and told him that isn't true and that the main reason why I don't talk that much is because I have a filter and I don't just blurt everything that is on my mind.

    Later that evening the girl that was in the room went up to me and said that she appreciated how I stood up to him. I felt a little bad that I did, but i have listened to him say some pretty stupid things twoards me and I guess because i was already in a frustrated mood, I just had to say something.
     
  6. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    That is a truly inspired reply! Brilliant! Good for you! Could I borrow that line some time if I need to? :)
     
  7. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Sure. No problem. I'm glad you found it inspiring.
     
  8. Jay19

    Jay19 Well-Known Member

    High school is full of narrow minded people, most havent grown up yet and wont for some time. You know in yourself you are a good person and would never do something like that. The guy at bible study is just like the people at school, narrow minded and judges people only on what they can see. Well done for standing up to him.