this is the reason

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by asking_advice, Dec 17, 2010.

  1. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    this is the reason why i dont want anyone to see my weakness. they will all leave except for my parents. i want to change. before when i dont know how to communicate in real life. people around me, dont want to be with me because i dont know how to communicate & the limitations.

    im sorry, if im needy here on net. i cant see the facial & body reactions so i dont know if im say something bad.

    im insecured here on net. im bad in english & from the different culture. i know how to communicate in real life. not here.

    im sorry


    i cant say my mental problem to my friends because depression here is not considered as a sickness. i dont want them to leave me or starting thinking im crazy.

    i tried different forums i can to have friends on net. everytime im attempting the end is "im needy" so they starting to ignore or telling me things that im faking so i can get attentions.

    i want to have a conversation when im in good mood or not depress. i cant, im not from western country. i learned communication skills so late.

    i cant command anyone here or other forums to understand because i know you have all issues.
     
  2. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    Don't worry, you're communicating well, hun. Where are you from?
    Depression is not considered an ilness in there... but don't you have someone you can trust to tell your feelings? Even your mom?

    You can always count on us, ok? If you feel you need to talk, or just have someone to be online with you, send me a message.
     
  3. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    im tired reading this sentence "im here for you".

    sorry, if i offended you.

    based on my experience. people here on net will leave me if im needy or too emotional. it happened for how many times.

    maybe i should be rational in forums & be more normal.
     
  4. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    You should be what you want to be. Here is a place where you can talk whatever you may be feeling, so you don't need to hide it. And hey, nobody here or anywhere can judge you. If you're suffering, let it out on words.
     
  5. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    there are a lot of people here on net cant understand me. im tired being myself.
     
  6. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Here for you now is often more appropriate, folks are flakes at best of times and as you have discovered, those around you are often not willing to be there now at all. If you are looking for something more than just now, then maybe you are looking for something else?

    There is usually someone online here that cares, if even because caring about others means they do not have to think about themselves, for 5 minutes, a day or however long they have the energy, at the end of the day we are willing but often not always capable, which feels a lot better than capable but not willing.

    Not a rant or a tell you off kind of post, just a tip to help you get the most out of the site and with everything, especially folks in our position, any help is often gratefully received but whenever we set ourselves goals and/or expectations, we have to make those goals as realistic as possible or we will inevitably set ourselves up for a fall and any fall validates us as a failure and that nobody cares, which, quite clearly, many do :)

    Be safe :hug:
     
  7. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    before i thought here on net i can be my real self. i had fantasy before that there are other people who will accept who i am and have enough patience because they have also same mental illness as me. that is only a fantasy.

    now, i use my mask again. especially in chatrooms.
     
  8. OhneDich

    OhneDich Well-Known Member

    Are you tired of being yourself with yourself or with the others?
     
  9. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    im slow in reading the should/shouldnt do here on net.

    in real life before i can have set of friends who give importance to me. it takes 18 years.

    im tired asking for support :)
     
  10. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    i can hide all the sadness to be part in this world and be true person at the same time.

    i decided not to be in touch in my emotion.. someday,, when is the right time.

    as of now. i forget all the loneliness, failures i did. i know there is a risk in my decision because there were times before. i ignore my issues and still bothers me. i think it is more rational to do than be not in control.

    i will be open in my feelings to my parents and therapist so he can help me to face this emotion and move on.

    right time. right place.

    i can pretend that im always ok. i did it before so i can do it again :)
     
  11. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    i can handle things smoothly as long there are no stressful events.
     
  12. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    everytime im alone or suicidal. only my parents give me support. sometimes i want to tell my friends but i know they dont understand it. im here in net. looking for friends and support but i dont get it. i ended being alone with my parents.

    im happy in my life. it's just that. there are times im looking for the support from other people even from net.

    i dont know why im like this. im trying every formula to be part in this community. i still dont get the friendship i want. :(
     
  13. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I'm kinda in a similar boat.. I mean my "friends" just robbed me when I was in the hospital so I really don't have any.. end up just with my parents (as a support) who trigger my PTSD :/ anyway.. I'm sorry your having a hard time making friends. I wish I could help more then I am.. Talk to you more in chat.

    Remember that the people on SF really do care :hug:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 21, 2010
  14. Ranai

    Ranai Member

    Were always gonna be here hon, no worries. Your communicating just fine. Im surprised that Depression isn't considered a sickness but I guess thats how the local government handles things. Were all here to offer our support either way so just know that we will be here for you.
    ^_^
     
  15. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    being weird in chatroom is forbidden. you need to be normal person because if you are not. people there.. starting to ignore you or look down to you.

    stop being whiner or quirky because if you do it. you are out in their league of friends.