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This isn't fair!!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Dunno, Apr 30, 2007.

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  1. Dunno

    Dunno Guest

    If I want to terminate my life then I should be allowed to! It's my life for gods sake!

    I'm a 27 year old man with BDD, depression and severe anxiety, I cannot handle social situations and I am too lazy/unmotivated to get help which wouldn't help me anyway cause councellors cannot tell me anything I don't already know. I have tried two councellors and meds and nothing helps. I live with my mother who is old and is going crazy, she also wants to kill herself. We have no family members left as they've all died in various ways.

    I am a very ugly person in appearance which forces me to stay indoors. I don't even look human. Nearly everytime I go outside I have been called "ugly" or various other negative things. I cannot even walk past the local kids here as they are so vicious with their words about my looks. It has left me with 0% confidence and with 0% confidence it is impossible to go out. I am lonely and girlfriendless and will always be that way.

    We are incredibly poor and my mother goes out to collect our sickness benefits and to buy our weekly shopping because I am completely agoraphobic. She owns a car, but drives around with no tax or insurance as she's too poor to pay for it. Today she hit a luxery car in our estate on her way out to shop and has caused some considerable damage. We have no money or savings and with no insurance we are completely fucked! It's possible that it will cost thousands to fix.

    I was saving to buy a gun to<Mod Edit: Abacus21-graphic>, but now I can't do that because I have to help pay for this! Here in London guns cost over a thousand pounds on the underground. I am desperate for a quick and easy suicide method that doesn't cost thousands. What I don't understand is that if your life is completely hopeless and sheer torment every single day, then what's the point of living? There is no hope/way out of this!

    I have never ever been this down, I have hit rock bottom.
    Last edited: May 1, 2007
  2. Dunno

    Dunno Guest

    I just don't want to live any longer. It's as if I just don't belong on this planet, but I just don't know how to leave it. :sad: :sad: :sad:
  3. LostMyMind

    LostMyMind Well-Known Member

    You sound an awful lot like me except trade BDD with hearing voices.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 30, 2007
  4. Dunno

    Dunno Guest

    Well I gotta thank you guys for all your help! I guess what you're ALL saying is that I am correct! <Mod Edit: Abacus21-promoting suicide>... I KNEW IT!!!

    Thanx again.

    See ya! :rolleyes:
    Last edited: May 1, 2007
  5. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    We're not saying that. No-one's said that at all.

    This site won't provide you with methods though - it's pro-life.
  6. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    First off dunno welcome to the forum. Give people time to respond..sometimes people are overly busy and don't have a lot of time.

    I'm sorry about your situation, i can't say i know what it's like b/c i don't. Is there any way you can get aid from your state(its called welfare in the US). If you talk to the guy about your situation can he figure out a way with the car damage to make it better. I don't know how that all works..im 27 and i don't drive much. As for everything else i can only hope for you that things get better. i wish i knew what else to say, not being in that situation it's tough for me to judge and comment

    I hope you do find help here its a great place. Take care
  7. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Suicide is not the answer, don't give up on counselors, doctors etc, you have to keep trying new treatments until you find one that works for you.
    As you live in the UK and are receiving sickness benefit you may well be entitled to other benefits, have you looked into this?
    If you and your mum are unable to go to the shops, then social services will give you help with that.
    May I suggest that you call your local citizens advise office and find out what you are entitled to.
    I realise that when you feel really low, its an effort to do anything but I think you or your mum need to set the wheels in motion to get the help you need.

    Take care Hazel
  8. Dunno

    Dunno Guest

    Thank you, I'm just desperate is all. I am on sickness benefits already, but there's no way we can get aid. The car belongs to a company and they don't really care about mentally ill people struggling to live on bread crumbs so they'll take us for every penny we have. The bright side is that it might not be expensive as first thought, but still expensive.

    Thanx again.
  9. Dunno

    Dunno Guest

    Thank you, I think my mothers too proud to have social services interfere too much, but I'll look into it.

    Thanx again.
  10. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    i hope thing all work out for you hun, in a positive way...if you ever need to talk feel free to PM me..If i don't answer it right away it's because im away for a bit. Do take care...

  11. Stylez

    Stylez Well-Known Member

    Well my friend had to live a homeless shelter for two years and now he's back on his feet. It's not the end of the world with this car situation. If you realize you hit rock bottom then all that is left is to go up toward the light. Maybe it's best you get sectioned so you can get help. I'll pray for you man.
  12. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Dear Dunno,I'm deeply sorry for the way you're feeling I do understand your situation I also suffer from Bi Polar,Ocd and Bdd and some form of Anxiety so I'm here to lend a hand anytime you need.I know how desperate it can be,my msn is milansteve@yahoo.com if you would like to add me.I know what it's like with Medication,counselling,therapy etc it's very difficult and alot worse when you're so down.

    I hope you can open up to me as I do understand how you feel mate,please try to hang in I know it's such a tough battle to say the least.
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