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This life to be returned

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by darkplace, Sep 7, 2008.

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  1. darkplace

    darkplace Well-Known Member

    I feel fake, empty and dead. Everyone isnt real. We are all driffting on to the same conclusion of death. There is no stopping it in the end. We can speed it up or try and prevent it. I chose the first option. I have had enough of being constantly in the wrong, saying the wriong things, being messed about by others. Of caring for people and having it thrown in my face. I never asked for this life. It is an unwanted gift that i wish to return. This yr will be my last i am certain. I will earn money. Travel if i can. See as many things as i can. Then diappear and count down the new yr and see if i can get to 1 before the drugs envolope me. I cant be here anymore. I dont want to carry on knowing that i will hurt others,that i cant help anyone i have ever tried to help. There will be no peace for me. So i will return this gift of sorrow and shame. I will contiune my constant vists here until that time. I love you all.

    I bleed. I cry. I live only to die. My constant thoughts are for u alone. I care for you. I love you. Be at peace, for i will try and watch over you when i am gone.
  2. titanic

    titanic Well-Known Member

    Gosh, you really are in a 'darkplace' at the moment :sad:
    You are a kind and caring person by the sound of what you wrote, but perhaps feel you are getting kicked in the teeth a little too often. What do you enjoy doing in life? Do you assume you will always feel this way?

  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You taking an extended vacation is actuatley a positive thought. You can build positives from that!! When you are feeling negative stop and think back to your vacation and use the positive to kick ass. You know I have read several posts where the person on the forum was taking a vacation to see if it helped them to change there minds. I just can't fathom it because I find it extremely hard to just leave my house for an appt. I think you should try therapy when you get back he/she can make a big difference in your life!! Please Take Care!!!:chopper:!!
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi darkplace. I think that taking a vacation will be a good way to relax and clear your thoughts. Everyone needs some time off sometimes. But please don't give up on life. Don't lose hope that things can get better. :hug:
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hello Darkplace, like everyone else, i also agree that taking a vacation is a positive step. It may give you the space you need to reconsider your decision. Im sorry you are feeling so low at the moment, if you need to talk feel free to PM me :arms:
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