This May Be Wrong

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by absolution, Apr 26, 2010.

  1. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I feel like i hurt alot of people. Im not sure how exactly but i feel like i do :(
    i feel like everything is just leading up to my suicide. idk what to do anymore. i feel like a total bitch. i am sorry to all the people i hurt. and... :cry: idk what to say except sorry
  2. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    Im sure thats not true hun.You are probably just like me in always thinking you're doing or saying something wrong.Im like that because everybody throughout my life has always put me down or left me.I guess I feel IVE driven them away.

    The posts that ive seen you make have been helpful and friendly.

    Chin up,they're truly some b******s out there (my ex being one of them) and im sure you;re not. xox
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 26, 2010
  3. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    i just cant seem to get my head out of all this...know what i mean? :hug: i just dont know what to do anymore. i dont want to hurt people anymore. i want to push everyone away but there a a certain few that wont let me do that.
  4. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    I dont think you are hurting people hun,im sure they understand.But yes I do know what you mean by "pushing" people away,weve all done it.Hell it was only this morning I asked for help via a pm and when I got some advice I got myself in such a state that I went quiet on that person for a while.

    In doing so I felt I hurt that person but thinking about it,because we all have been in such similar situations im sure they understood.I didnt want to hurt them but I needed space.

    Can I ask is it space that you are needing?In saying theres a few that wont let you push them away,is that because you want them to leave you alone?Or just that you think if you dont you will hurt them?Like I said im sure your friends will understand,I may not know you as well as some others on here but I can feel and understand your pain and I am so sorry you are feeling this way.

    You can talk to me anytime(and if you want to push me away at any point just try your best to find a smilie that resembles you bashing me round the head with summat hehe).....:hug::yes:
  5. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    thanks that last part made me laugh and i needed a laugh :p
    i want to push people away so it wont hurt so bad when i end it. i dont see how i can go on. i dont want to hurt these people but i really dont see how i can go on much longer. i love them all so much thats why i feel like i have to do this. But i know they wont let me...and im not sure if that makes me happy or scared. the love i have for them is so great i cant even describe it. :cry: but im scared...i dont know what to do anymore :(
  6. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    I think you may have just answered your own question there hun.If there are people around you that love you that much and you love them that much then you really cant do that to yourself or them.Please dont hurt yourself,please please please.

    Since being on this site I am now converted.And by that I mean I now realise there is always somebody worse off than yourself.I nearly ended it all last week,but I justified it in my head that I truly didnt have anybody around me that would care.I dont have friends or family(I couldve been dead for years as far as they are aware)and now I dont even have my partner.

    Please see that life is worth living if you have people and love in it.If idve had somebody,anybody perhaps I wouldnt thought about going down that route as I wouldve had them to talk to.Im not preaching hun,I know you are in unbelievable pain and I wish I could take it away from you.

    Please see that you have alot to live for.Ok im rambling again.........its time.

    Go on then you know you want to.......erm.....closest I could find is:mortdesinos:

    My sense of humour is lame but it seems to be doing the trick so far:cool:
  7. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    haha i love your sense of humor...
    so do i live for those that cant lose me and live in pain??
    i just cant see past this wall in front of me.. :cry:
    i want it all to go away. :cry: i wanna scream right now. and im trying to sit here in front of this computer like i was told so i dont go to the place which i designated as...well i think you get it.
    It hurts so much :cry:
  8. TriEdge

    TriEdge Member

    Well, you know what they say...if there's a wall you just need to bash a big ol' hole in it!
  9. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    If only it were that easy hun :cry: