This motherfucker...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by AsphyxiateOnMisery, Apr 15, 2015.

  1. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    There are no words for this. He's worried about me obsessing about my weight, so what he does is he argues with me about it for hours until I'm screaming, crying, and throwing shit, all the while knowing that freaking out that much could land me in the hospital again because that level of stress is bound to make my crohn's (which is already bad enough that I have to get surgery in June) worse. And yet he continues doing what he's doing despite what it's obviously causing. And again, this being because of me obsessing about my weight - being depressed about it, counting calories, weighing myself, etc. So it's not even because of anything life threateningly serious like not eating at all, it's about calorie-counting, which granted is still unhealthy maybe but definitely not worth that much fucking grief, and 100% not worth me ending up in the hospital from having to argue about it with him. And now this fucking asshole just leaves and doesn't tell me where the fuck he's going. Yeah, so much for no stress. That's fucking impossible being in my head and living with the people I live with.
     
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I suffer with similar physical issues, was dx with chrons but im confused about my condition cos the doctor said inflammatory bowel disease. It IS tough and I think he should be more understanding towards you, talk to you without arguing and try to understand. You deserve that at least. I care hun :hug: I have to take colofac,colpermine and buscopan daily and sometimes strong painkillers, with treatment it's ok but having people around you that don't get it just sucks :(
     
  3. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    Wow me and you seem to have a lot of the same diagnoses, lol. Crohn's is a type of inflammatory bowel disease, so when he's saying that he does mean crohn's. I'm on Pentasa and Budesonide right now. My doctor wanted to put me on Remicade also (or however you spell it), but since my last hospital stay he looked at my catscan disk that I gave him and apparently he thinks the inflammation has gotten too large to treat with medicine, so he thinks surgery would be a better option at this point. I'm kind of scared, but not as much about the surgery as possible complications that could arise and possibly having to spend nights alone at the hospital afterwards if they don't let my husband stay with me like they did at the other one I was at. Although, granted, surgery wise I trust this hospital and these doctors a lot more. The other ones at the one closer to me I've been going to seem like they don't know what the hell they're talking about half the time.

    As for my OP, my husband comes back about 20 minutes later with blood all over his hands. Apparently, he knocked somebody out and broke his nose. Not for any reason in particular either, just cause it was the first person he saw and he was pissed off about the whole situation with us. Extremely fucking stupid of a thing to do, but unfortunately I'm used to that from him, he's got some serious anger issues, so not really a shock unfortunately. As for me, I knew he wouldn't leave me the fuck alone about it no matter what the consequences could be with my stomach or anything else, so I ended up lying and saying I'm not going to do those things anymore. I don't know what the fuck he wants from me though, because if I don't do those things, I'm going to end up more depressed and worried and self-conscious and I don't want that. He can't seem to comprehend that, or he just doesn't care and thinks I should be able to deal with it or make it go away somehow, which I can't. So, yeah.
     
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Don't tell him you're doing it.
    His anger is his own problem and you don't need to be the whipping boy.
    Seems to me, and I may be well off base, that he's a bit of a control freak.
     
  5. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    What about counseling
     
  6. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    He is with some things, yeah. But I'd be lying if I said I'm not controlling in any way. But yeah that's what I've been doing..just trying to hide it more so it doesn't start that again. He's right in the fact that I do have a problem, but I don't think it's as huge as he's making it out to be. I'm not losing any more weight, I'm not underweight, and if by chance I do lose more without meaning to I'll just eat a little more. Not that huge of a deal. It does cause me a lot of mental distress perhaps, but that can't be fixed overnight, and it sure as hell can't be fixed by doing what he's doing.
     
  7. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    I think he and I would drive that counselor and each other even more insane than we do now. I already know how that would go, counselor would say something one of us doesn't like, and then that person is going to try to prove their point until it gets the other person pissed off and it will continue from the counselor's office all the way home until someone starts crying. Probably me.