This Place

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Porcelain, Dec 27, 2006.

  1. Porcelain

    Porcelain Well-Known Member

    I don't know why I come here. I don't think I should be here, nor do I want to be here sometimes. Yet here I am, like a bad seed. This place is like some kind of addiction, and not even a good one. I don't have friends here. I don't really have anything here but I come here nearly everyday without fail. Why do I do that? What is this place actually doing for me? What I am doing for this place? What difference is it making to me, my life? What difference am I making to others lives? None that I can see, none at all. I don't understand myself and my need to come here. Do I really need to be here? Yes I have suffered from depressive states. Yes, I used to self harm, still do occasionally. Yes, I have problems with food. But am I suicidal? No, I'm not. Why do I come here? What else should I be doing instead? I should be making a difference somewhere else. But when is it enough? I don't like myself sometimes. I confuse myself. I'm far too cynical when I read some of the posts here. I'm far too hard. I wish that I had never found this place sometimes or that I could erase it from my mind and computer. I need to try and stay away from here.

    I hope you all find whatever it is you're looking for. Take care of yourselves.
  2. jjustme

    jjustme Guest

    You don't have to know where you come here... You can be here without a reason... But I think you have a reason. Here are the people who know how you feels, the people who talk to you when you need it, the people who care about you. For me it's maybe an addiction too... But I don''t think it's a bad one. Why is it a bad one? You can read the story's of the other girls and boys, and you can maybe understand some of your own behaviour with that story's. Maybe this is a place where you feel safe... The people'll don't give you reactions like: oh well, you're a nasty goth because you're cutting! OR other stupid reactions like that. The reactions will maybe help you to feel better. you don't have to be suicidal to be here... You're a SI'er, you have problems with food.. That's more then enough! You don't have to have a reason to be here.. Even when you feel right you can be here.
    Why do you need to stay away from here? I think it will help you out of your problems!

    Good luck:hug: