Time is ticking by another day has come and gone I am no closer to a solution than yesterday. My partner went to visit her kids and she will be back soon and everything will just go one as per normal SF will be a memory I will be back in my box undercover keeping my secrets fighting my impulse to terminate my life not because I have hope but because they say it is selfish what about the ones left behind, they say there is always another option a way out it will get better. They say I am the only one that can fix it. I have been trying searching hanging on but apparently not hard enough I died along time ago I just need to pull the plug If only I can shoot my conscience. When I was young I thought just hang in there things will get better but they never have and I now realize they never will.