I know it's going to happen. There's nothing. Why? Sometimes I think about the pain I will cause all who care to try to convince myself not to. But then I realize they need it. It's coming. No date, no time, no method, it will be random. Now it's just a matter of when I can finish answering. Why? Because I need to prove to myself that HE does not exist. If he exists? Then why? If he is Merciful, then WHY?! Of course there's also the fact that I am simply not a good person. I lie, cheat, steal, cause pain, cause conflict, always assume the worst in people, I can keep going. Anyway, I was talking to someone and he said I should talk to people. He recommended this site. Not to downgrade you or anything but I doubt you'll make a difference. He says this is a step. I told him that I will do it for him. He's the only one that knows. Know one else suspects.