Till then!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Reki, Apr 13, 2008.

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  1. Reki

    Reki Well-Known Member

    Hello everyone, I just wanted to tell you all that I'm going. For a while I wasn't sure whether or not I was ready or if I should even say anything, as I don't think I made very many friends in my time here so I probably won't stick around in anyone's memories for very long but in the end I decided it was the right thing to do. I hope no one will misunderstand, I'm leaving because I believe I've finally found happiness. It's fleeting and I know this feeling will fade and I'll feel sorrow again but I've realized that I will also feel happiness again. I feel complete, as if I could pass away in this very instant and leave content. I still have problems, I suppose I always will but somehow it makes me feel human. For the first time in a long time I feel like I'm finally exactly where I'm supposed to be.

    I just want to use my last post to thank everyone, coming here was the best decision I ever made and I love each and every one of you to death. I know I didn't mingle much and I can probably count the members I've spoken directly to on one hand with fingers to spare but all the same, I just wanted to thank everyone as every post I read was a step forward, even if I didn't realize it at the time. You are all people that truly shine and I hope you won't forget that as the times get rougher. We all live in our own separate realities and what you think is what is. Happiness exists. Love exists. Life has meaning. I wish I could tell you what I mean but I can't, I don't even know why and for the first time I don't care that I don't know. I don't care that I can't define what I'm feeling logically and that I can't see my destination, I'm just being alive and it's wonderful.

    It's taken a long time to get here and I know the journey isn't even halfway over yet, I just wanted to tell everyone that it's because of your help that I was even able to put my socks on. So I guess this it, I'm out of words and there's everything and nothing to say at the same time. So long everyone, I'll be wishing you the world until the end of it all and my time here will never be forgotten. We'll probably never meet again but who knows, it's a small world!

    Goodbye all!
  2. Mortem

    Mortem Well-Known Member

    Wonderful post, and remember - may it be tomorrow or many years from now you'll always be welcome back here.

    I regret never having the pleasure of getting to know you. Best of luck to you, wherever you choose to journey. :smile:
  3. bleach

    bleach Well-Known Member

    You never struck me as being depressed to begin with. Good luck at doing your thing.
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I am glad you feel the way you do. i wish you the best in your life. Take care Reki. :hug:
  5. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Its nice if you can feel happiness again. I wish if it could never fade away for you.
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Reki the fight has been long and hard but you have made it to a place that you want to be. I'm so proud of you. And along the way, you helped many others with your kind words and understanding. You say that you can count the number of people you have talked to but trust me you will never be able to count the numbers you helped and touched with your words. I'm so happy for you. But please hun, never ever try to carry on this new path alone. When you come across the bumps and hills that we both know are going to be there, remember the family you have made at SF and dont hesitate to come "home" whenever you need to. The door is always open and the hugs are free. Good luck Reki. You'll be in my prayers.
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