I guess at the moment I am stable. But I wasn't before. I've tried killing myself practically every way. The last time before Wed night, was over two years ago. I was going to run infront of a car, but my parents somehow found out and put me into a hospital. I then found out that one of my friends died in a car crash two hours before. I think that I should be dead and not her. I wanted to die, not her. I think about her a lot and I know she should be here on earth and not me. I told myself I would never do anything like that again, for Ang. But on wed night, I did. I tried to hang myself. I only thought of that because my friend hung himself last March. I thought if he could do it, I could too. I took a string from my sweat shirt and wrapped it very tight around my neck. Within seconds, I could feel the blood getting trapped. My head hurt really bad and I felt like my ear drums were going to pop. Thats the only reason I stopped. Things are just tough and I don't know how to deal with them so I think about taking the easy way out. I just am so lonely and it sucks. Plus I have a lot of other problems, but no one really cares. I don't know if I will try again or not. I am hoping I don't, but I don't know.