Every time I see her she always has something negative to say about me. Just in the past 2 weeks, here's a few things I remember off the top of my head that she's said to me: Why are you wearing white? No one wears white during winter. Why couldn't you wear a different color? Ever since you lost weight, your nose looks bigger now. You're too skinny, and it's not attractive anymore. Why are you wearing those boots with that top? They don't go together. You're dressed like a hooker. You don't keep your room orderly enough. When are you going to start working already? (And this, considering the fact that I've been recently diagnosed with crohn's, need surgery soon, and can't work) You can't cook properly for yourself, you eat a bunch of crap and probably make your crohn's worse (which is complete bullshit, I've been following the diet my GI recommended to the tee). Like I said, these are just a few things from the past 2 weeks that I can think of off the top of my head, but there's probably a lot more I'm just not remembering. And seriously, I'm starting to get sick and fucking tired of all of it. Reading back those things I wrote, it undoubtedly seems like she's deliberately trying to crush my self-esteem and make me feel like I can't do anything right for myself. My husband tells me to do the same shit to her that she does to me. Tell her that I hate how she's dressed, and that she needs to lose weight, etc. Now I'm not the type of person that would get satisfaction from making my own mother feel like shit, but there's no reason for her to constantly do it to me either, and I have no idea how else to approach this. If I tell her the things she says hurt me, it won't make a lick of difference. She'll say something like "Well, if I don't tell you "the truth", who will?" or "I'm only saying it cause I want what's best for you" and etc. She'll make me feel like an asshole for questioning it or getting offended basically. When she said the thing about why are you wearing those boots with that top and that I look like a hooker, my response was that I like it and I'm free to dress however I want to dress, and she said I was being rude, making me immediately feel like an asshole when I shouldn't be because I was speaking the truth and defending myself. So, I don't know what the hell else to do. I don't want to resort to being as much of a dick as she is, but I'm not sure if doing anything else would work.