Don't even know where to start with this, but I feel like I'm in trouble. I've been sick for 14 years with what I believe to be from mixed connective tissue disease. Severe fatigue, constant pain, now neuropathy, so I get to feel like bugs are crawling all over me, not to mention all of my other annoying problems. The fatigue really makes me feel bad. It's taken everything from me. Since I was in my mid 20's, all I have been able to do most of the time is lay around in bed sick. I got divorced 4 years after getting ill, and chose not to get involved in another relationship because I've been so sick. I was mentally & sexually abused because my ex wanted custody of my kids. I lived with him for over a year before I moved out. I developed PTSD and a severe depressive disorder during which time I made multiple suidical attempts. I have not been able to work, it's hard enough keeping up with everything else. I had 2 kids to raise, tough, but I managed. They grew up resenting me for being sick. It's not like that now, but I think about it alot. All the remarks, how I was worthless, that my life was meaningless, that I'm a lazy piece of crap, how I was faking my illness. They never understood, no one really has. I've been fighting for a diagnosis because it was taken away, and I cannot function without medication to treat that disease. I'm taking it now but it only partially helps. I'm not really that depressed anymore, but I have my moments. When I get really sick, it all starts kicking in. I can't stand it anymore. I feel like if things don't change, I am just going to give up. I guess that is why I am here, hoping someone can help me see why I shouldn't do that. I love my kids, I don't want to leave them. I also would like my life if I didn't have to suffer so much.