Tired Of Loosing People..

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Kiba, Jun 26, 2010.

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  1. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I just cant take losing any more people.. Im tired of seeing and hearing about ppl dieing.. Im sick of being cursed to hear and see these things.. I dont know what else to do.. I just dont think I can do this anymore..

    Goodbye..
     
  2. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Yeah I know is hurts it is so tragic and it makes you question everything, I overheard a conversation at work the other week, they were talking about me and they said something clich├ęd I know but really hit home, they said:

    they would not want to see him suffering like this

    Basically they would want you to have a chance at being happy, they would not want to be the cause of you ending your life okay

    Please take care

    Rich
     
  3. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Death is a natural part of life Swift, unless of course you're referring to suicide deaths. Please don't go. One of the consequences of being a member of a suicide prevention forum is that at some point, someone is going to give up and commit suicide. All we can do is try our best to prevent this from happening, but you have to be prepared to deal with it. I've lost many loved ones already, though not to suicide. You can't let it get the better of you. :hug:
     
  4. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I really dont think anyone will understand..
    Ive lost so many people.. seen so much death.. Ive had ppl irl die, ppl on my messanger die, and people from here die..

    I know my brother, aunt, and cousin died..
    Saw a guy get shot 2 months ago..
    Saw another person run into a tree in a car and die..
    Have heard of ppl on my messanger that have died...
    Lots of my pets have died..
    etc..

    This all within a few years..

    Not to mention all the crap I had as a kid and crap with my family and crap with foster homes and on and on..

    At the moment Im at my foster parents family gathering and Im feelin like shit cuz I dont know anyone and I feel isolated and lonely..

    Blah Blah Blah.. enough crap.. just wana die..
     
  5. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    If your talking about me you havent lost me yet :hug: please stay :(
     
  6. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Its not just you Im afraid... :( Ive lost a lot of people..
     
  7. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Im sorry hun :( Im jsut making it worse :(
     
  8. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Its not makin it worse.. been thinkin bout this a long time..
    I just get too scared when it comes down to it.. :(
     
  9. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I wish i could hug you :(
     
  10. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I wish u could too.. I wish I had someone to hug here.. dont have no one...
     
  11. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :hugtackles: :hug: :cheekkiss:
     
  12. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I want to cry.. but I cant.. Im still at this family gathering for my foster parents.. Idk what to do now.. I just.. feel like shit.. :(
     
  13. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Let me ask you a honest question. Have you tried EVERYTHING in life before giving up? We can see you have done certain things and lived a certain way to this point. Have you ever considered doing the opposite? Apparently this way of life isn't working for you. Perhaps starting fresh would work? I would move and start over in a different town. It is nice to be able to begin anew. I started everything new, and I have been rewarded for it. Life is worth trying every option before giving up in my opinion. Death will always be there regardless, and I do not see any reason to rush the inevitable. If you would like to share I am here, if not with me I hope you find someone you can share with. Peace be with you, and blessings..
     
  14. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Ive lived with my parents.. lived as a mormon like them.. Am livin as my own person now.. but feel rejected.. Sick of it.. Sick of the judement.. sick of bein alone.. Im leavin damn foster care next month, but I dont think Ill be able to do it.. I cant hold a job.. cany hold nothin.. anxious as hell and been feelin terriblly sick and wanting to puke every time I eat. Always walkin arround downtown in the city doin nothin.. no one talks to me.. Tired of crap.. Dont have no purpose.. lost my purpose 5 years ago.. Lost a lot.. I feel like ur attackin me sayin that I basically have no reason to feel like shit cuz I havent tried ANYTHIN!!! IVE TRIED TONS OF STUFF!! IVE TRIED TO DO EVRERYTHIN I CAN! Im not tryin to piss you off or whatever.. just hope you understand Im not thinkin of doin crap lightly.
     
  15. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Man foster care is awful. I had put myself in it when I was sixteen. My folks put me in a mental hospital for running away. I was ticked! They could not understand why I was the way I was. I could have told them, but they did not ask..
     
  16. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Im sry for yellin... I just hate ppl tellin me I havent done crap.. I especially hate religion (no offense). All religions Ive tried just judge me and I hate it! I hate that you have to conform to "their" ways and do what they say and beleive whatever they want you to beleive..
     
  17. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I would never attack you. Do you have hobbies, or passions? People tend to meet others doing things they like. Sounds like, you want friends. Well, this place can offer that. Foster care is horrible, because it is like an endless cycle of rejection. I do understand how you feel there. bouncing from facility to home, to facility again. My case worker HATED ME, and she let me know too. I would like to be friends with you. We already have some experiences that are in common. I was always the outsider because of moving. It was like that before foster care too. You know I still do not understand why we moved all the time.. either way it s8cked for me.
     
  18. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    sigh... If you want to be friends.. idk.. I cant find no one to be friends irl.. Im tired of ppl on the bus makin comments about me and askin their friends if Im a guy or girl.. Im not sure me n you would do well as friends if u have problems with trans folks.. seein as it looks like ur religious.. but idk.

    Im just sick of betrayal, rejection, death, and lonliness..
     
  19. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Hey I don't take offense I apologize if I came off wrong. I was never raised in religion. I would share my story, but I do not want you to think I was preaching at you, so I won't. Either way, my faith helps me. It may not work for you and that is fine. I am not a Mormon or never was a Mormon, but one of my ministers was and he said the same things you are. He left that faith, but that's a totally differ subject. I am sure you have done many things to try to make life tolerable. I knew I did, but nothing worked until I gained faith. I couldn't imagine what it is like for you, but I would like to get to know you.I care, and I am no one special, but another human on this planet looking for friends. :)
     
  20. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    So you're transgendered? There's nothing wrong with that, morally or religiously. Are you a guy that became a girl, or a girl that became a guy?
     
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