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Tired of these feelings

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ckeaweahe, Oct 13, 2010.

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  1. ckeaweahe

    ckeaweahe Active Member

    The title pretty much says it all.. It sucks when you can't enjoy life the way other people do everyday. Maybe im just jealous.. I don't care. Death to me just seems so right for me. I can't picture myself staying any longer than a year. I don't even know why.
    But im sick of being here. Sick of being around myself. In the day, I have to pretend to people. At night, when people finally leave you alone, you remember how pointless everything is, cause you fucked up. Im sick of feeling sad though. This month, I feel stronger. I've excepted the fact that death is my only way. I feel like if I die, the way I wanna die, I can forgive myself.
    Its just sad to see other people feel like this. I don't care bout myself, but I've always wanted to make the world a better place. I know other people have it worst than me. Its all good, I think I finally know how I can do the world a favor.
    Im not gonna feel like a bitch and feel bad for myself everyday though. Ill be happy when I die.

    Sorry for wasting your time. Just venting, since I can never share these thoughts w anyone in RL
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    we won't be happy we will be very sad that you did not get the help support you needed. I hope you talk to your doctors and get your medication uped or changed if the depression is still there. therapy helps as well Do something exiciting just for you okay anything you wanted to do Change your routine up a bit add something new I hope the feelings go away and you stay okay
  3. ckeaweahe

    ckeaweahe Active Member

    Hey thanks for the support, but let's be realistic please. Nobody would even know I left. My ex would be soo happy. I will NOT seek a counselor or doctor. I just wanna die, I know its not asking for too much.
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