Tired

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by futilitytheory, Oct 14, 2014.

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  1. futilitytheory

    futilitytheory New Member

    Relatively speaking my life isn't so bad. I have a wife who loves me. My parents and brothers are alive and well and love me too. I have a smattering of friends around the country that I get together with in varying frequency. I've got a decent job that I'm good at and no significant cash problems.

    So why am I here? Because none of this brings any joy to my life. I care about all of these people and have spent years (if not decades) trying to make my love for them, and theirs for me, enough to sustain myself. The effort is exhausting. The sad fact is that I go through the motions of being a good husband, son, brother, friend, or employee but at every turn I still feel alone. I want to feel connected in a way that is meaningful and life affirming, but wanting doesn't make it so.

    Perhaps this resonates with some people and perhaps not. Ultimately I guess it doesn't make a difference. I'm just tired; tired of everyone and everything. I am alone on my journey as I always have been. It may just be time for me to admit that it is less a journey and more aimless wandering that needs to come to an end.
     
  2. futilitytheory

    futilitytheory New Member

    "This user has no status" --- that seems right to me.
     
  3. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    The user has no status may or may not fit very well - as it is completely up to you. You can choose to got to the settings and put in a status or choose to leave it as it is with no status. If you have spent years doing the same routine and it brings no joy or satisfaction then there are things you can look at. Firstly, if you have actual depression , that is the basic symptom and meaning of depression so you can choose to go and get evaluated and treated or choose not to.

    For other things in your life, before deciding where to spend next vacation, or next weekend even, ask yourself if it will matter to you or make you feel like you have done something worthwhile. If not, then think of something that would and put into action a plan to do that instead. If oyu know that doing these things is bringing you know joy or sense of fulfillment , then talk about it with your wife and think of some things that will or even just things that "might" and try those instead. It is a better option than meandering around doing things "just because", and if after you do some different and new things perhaps you will find something that is better and more interesting to you, or maybe you will gain some appreciation for what you had been doing that has lost interest for you.
     
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