Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by kindtosnails, Apr 19, 2007.

  1. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    Nothing has changed. Nothing. Nothing more has happened. So why all of a sudden am I am mess, a shivering, shaking, panicking mess? Why all of a sudden can I not function, not do my job because half the time I can't work out where the hell I am or who I am...Is it memories coming and fucking things up and why now?? Or am I just going mad...All I want to do these days is hide in the smallest space I can find and not come out, ever. I really feel like doing something to myself that is pretty horrible and sick enough that I won't post it, but at least it would lead to a quick death. Not so great for whoever finds me. I'm so sick of this. Past should stay in the goddamn past, not creep up on you for no particular reason, argh shaking so much.
  2. crzykidshanana

    crzykidshanana Well-Known Member

    What is it about your past that is revisiting you? Just thoughts? A person?

    Anything I can do to help?
  3. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    I doubt there's anything anyone can do, no. Just 'letting it out' as the forum says, makes me feel slightly less insane than talking to myself, or than only talking to myself. Tricks me into believing I'm not alone. Ha. Ha.
  4. crzykidshanana

    crzykidshanana Well-Known Member

    Well, you're not alone?

    All of us on here are seeking out that feeling that we're not alone...

    it just depends on whether or not people come to terms with the fact n' grow from it...

    or whether or not they want to convince themselves otherwise.
  5. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    You say that with such conviction.

    It's ok. I do realise, just feels better to pretend I'm not sometimes.

    Wish it would stop. I wish it would stop. Everything is just too fast. Even the song in my head is too fast, or I'm too slow, being left behind. I wish I wasn't afraid of every male on the planet. Wish they wouldn't give me reason to be. They can't all be the same. What the hell did I do?

    Does it make no sense? Nothing makes sense.
  6. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    I'm so fucking tired of trying to act sane when all I want to do is scream my fucking head off, and never stop. When all I want to do is burn every other place they touched until it's nothing and just disappear.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 19, 2007
  7. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    Not alone.

    Ha. Ha. Ha.
  8. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    And when 5/7 posts on your thread are your own you should probably give up talking to yourself. :sad:
  9. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    You're not alone sweetie. I'm here if you wanna PM me :)