to believe or not to believe....

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by justmeonlyme, Jul 24, 2010.

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  1. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    before i say anything please do not judge me on this i do not judge you for what you do or dont believe so i would like the same in return i just need to idk get this out as i cant talk to people irl about it...

    ok well 1st of all i grew up in a family COMPLETELY against any sort of religion and the idea of any of us kids (my younger brother and sister and i) believing in any sort of religion there was no way that would ever happen we where always told that religious people where a bunch of crazy people who believed lies and would try convince us to believe there lies but we had to always remember theres no such thing as God and if anyone tryed to tell as other wise then they where crazy! so that basically explains how my family react to the idea of religion...
    well then when i was i think i was about hmmmm i think i was about 14 a friend asked me if i wanted to go to youth group with her i was like ummm ok not knowing it was a church youth group... so yea i went and i had fun i didn't tell mum it was a church based youth group so i was aloud to keep going i wasn't keen on the religion side of things but the people seemed nice and at that point i didn't have many friends and spent a lot of time at home so i was like might as well go as it got me out of the house.... ok i think im going on a bit basically what im trying to say is that i ended up starting to believe in the hole God thing and all that and eventually gave my life the lord... this is all still behind my mums back...
    then i eventually told her and well her reaction... lets just say she was not happy not at all...i started attending church and was still going to youth group and all that she always made things hard constantly making smart comments about been crazy and all that sorta made things hard i was trying to hold on to my faith way also battling depression, self harm and suicidal thoughts and also the comments from mum it made it so hard i tryed to cling to what a believed but slowly i stopped going to church so much until i didn't even think about going anymore... i was still attending the youth group but after a while i even stopped going to that
    i feel like im not sure i stopped believing for me like i feel as if i was pushed into not believing... like i think the comments from mum they got to a point where i just couldn't take them thats why i first stopped going to church so much i feel kinda bad coz i let her comments get into my head but idk i feel like i still kinda believe but i feel like if i started going back to church the comments would come back and like people at church would like think weirdly of me idk like i left then came back like they would want to no why or something... idk...
    im not sure what the point in this post was and im sorry its so long this is just something thats been building up in my head for along time now..
  2. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    I don't believe in an awful lot. Maybe there's an after life. I kinda hope there is. My beliefs can change with my mood usually :mhmm:. I'm accepting of basicly all religions, with the exception of those that contain negative vibes etc. I just have to remember that the people that believe in those religions are just doing what they think will get them through the day. That's the reason we do anything.

    If you feel as though you would like to go back to church, do so :smile:. If you go back and people ask you why you left just say you had some problems you needed to sort out.

    Maybe you could tell your mum about how these comments make you feel? And that your faith is what helps get you through the day.

    Either way, do what YOU think is best :)

    Good luck, :hug:
  3. ema

    ema Antiquities Friend

    Do what your heart tells you. That's the best advice I can think of.

    People at the church will more than likely welcome you back with open arms. Having somebody come back is usually a joy. It's having somebody back in the family, the fold.

    If you are worried about your mother's comments, one thing you may do is ask the minister/pastor if you can talk to him/her. He/She may have ideas about how to deal with this.

    Also, you can tell you mother to stop. There is nothing wrong with this. Tell her this is what you want for your life, that it has meaning for you and that you would appreciate her keeping her thoughts about it to herself. It's ok to stand up for yourself.

    I hate to think of you avoiding something that gives you relief and pleasure because of somebody else's opinion. If there is no threat of abuse for going, other than her comments, try to hold firm and go back. Maybe try to build a support group that you can talk to about this and call when she starts.

    I don't really have an answer, but I hope maybe this will help. Good luck, and God bless you.
  4. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    I'm not religious, but your parents sound like they could be a lot more supportive.
  5. 1izombie

    1izombie Well-Known Member

    What your mom did was wrong, she shouldnt have made those comments especially considering how they make you feel. Idk if you told her how it makes you feel but that might be a starting point. Whether she likes it or not she can't control what you believe in. I'm not religious what so ever but if it give you joy and helps you then whats the harm? Your mother should be smart enuff to see that for herself.
  6. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    K, me personally, I do not believe in god, or any of that tbh.
    But i do believe that everyone is entitled to their own views, so long as they dont force it on others.
    So I think your mum is wrong in forcing you not to believe, you should be allowed to make your own mind on that. and if it helps you, why shouldnt you do it?
    I think you have to think of yoruself hun. its YOUR faith. not hers.
  7. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Hi Emma. I'm sorry to hear that your mom has rejected your religious beliefs and has caused you to stop going to church and the youth group. If you really believe in God, then you really don't have to go to church. You can just pray at home. I think that being part of the youth group is a good thing because it gives you a place to go and spend some time with friends. That is pretty much the primary reason that I go to my temple on sundays. :hug:
  8. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    Exactly - it's not just religious, it's social. No harm in that.
  9. TJ

    TJ Staff Alumni

    hey Emma ,
    having had a christian background and then being thrown out of church for being who i am , i dont believe in god . what i do believe in is a higher power who looks out for me , anyways thats just a little background history on me so u can see why i believe in what i do now ...
    My point : lol to me 'god' has always been a confronting subject i believed in him but never understood why he would give me such a horrible life , full of abuse and neglect. then when the church i belonged to asked me to never come back due to me 'comming out' i became athiest/agnostic i didnt believe that there was a 'god' or anything that i believed in myself and that was enough ... obviously this didnt work for me either .. ive now come to believe that basicly there is no 'god' as such but there is a higher power who looks out for me and helps me when i need it , im not saying that everyone should believe what i believe because that would be 'forcing upon others' something that maybe isnt true for them .
    so what im trying to say thru all this is that for everyone there is something out there thats worth believeing in , weither it be god, a higher power , budha , islam or whatever else there is and for everyone what they choose to believe in , its there right to have total faith in that , what ur mum did i think is very wrong u are ur own person and should be aloud to believe in whatever u wish , nothing is right or wrong in this subject whatever u choose is right for urself but maybe not for another .
    i dont judge people because there christian , just like i dont judge people because there gay . whatever ur heart tells u is right for u , go for it because this is where u will find true peace within urself . like someone else has said eairlier in this theard follow ur heart ..
    anyways enough of my ramblings .. if u wanna chat more about this feel free to pm me and ill keep my eye on this theard too , :)
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