to die perchance to dream

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Brighid Moon, Aug 7, 2009.

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  1. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

  2. ashes_away

    ashes_away Well-Known Member

    don't make me turn this day around AND go get you! ((hugs))

    talk to us
     
  3. christian_1990

    christian_1990 Well-Known Member

    que paso seƱorita!

    what happened
     
  4. ashes_away

    ashes_away Well-Known Member

    having a bad night?It's ok! just talk to us,hon.
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    What's going on brighid? :hug:
     
  6. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

    I almost went to the hospital. I still might. I'm less hysterical now. I still have no sleep. I did cut on my arm. I discovered my knives are not sharpened - I need to fix that. I have to get away from my dad. I called support groups and am going to YWCA battered women's support group to get support. Sorry for going off again. My chest hurts really badly. I beat myself up. I'm losing it hard core. I need help. I haven't been this bad in four years. I'm sorry.
     
  7. triggs

    triggs Account Closed

    :hug: xx
     
  8. ashes_away

    ashes_away Well-Known Member

    :cheekkiss: don't give up
     
  9. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

    I'm having continual chest pains now.

    I'm not going to the hospital.

    If its not a heart attack, or pulmonary embolism, then it doesn't matter. If it is ...

    Then it doesn't matter.
     
  10. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    Hope you are o.k. You are important to us! :hug:
     
  11. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    How are you feeling now? If you need the hospital for any reason, please go. So many here care about you. :hug:
     
  12. Brighid Moon

    Brighid Moon Member & Antiquities Friend

    I'm having panic and anxiety but I finally got some sleep, even if it was with the vivid dreams and nightmares again (so really kind of worthless). I'm still having chest pains. I think they're anxiety. I'm just letting them happen. I haven't been this bad in so long. I'm lost. I feel alone. I have to make such hard decisions and I don't want to because none of them are acceptable. Mourning losses. I dreamed of my dead mother. I dreamed she died again. She was hurt, she was bleeding all over. She cracked her head. It was horrible. Climbing up a straight-up street and no help. I barely made it over the edge. Tomorrow I have to go see my dad, and he calls again in less than ten minutes. Nothing ever changes. I'll get the guilt again. I always get the guilt. I can't bear it. I hope I die.
     
  13. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear that your feeling so bad. Have you tried therapy or medications? I mean if you have dealing with this for so long you may need help or at least assistance through this difficult time.
    There is a part of you that wants to live as I believe you would not have posted so please listen to that part of you however difficult it is to hear.
    Keep posting so we can offer support but please go to the hospital ...you body is trying to tell you something.
    B
     
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