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to much

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cant_go_on

#1
this is all to much for me. im sitting here, not in school again, and trying to figure out what i should do. i cant do this. its all to much for me and i am giving up. i have been trying so damn hard to get thru each day, but it is not working. i slit my wrists again last night hoping that it will work. woke up this morning and i felt really horrible. i tried going to school, but i left instead. one of the teachers were really worried about me, but i could not talk to them. i looked at her and said goodbye. and walked out.

now im sitting here, crying, wishing that i would just die. knowing how bad this all hurts is just killing me. i look at my cat, and i cry. i dont know why but i do.

i dont know how much longer i can hang in there. i want to dissapear and go somewhere far away so my body wont be found.

im crying so much right now, i am confused about what to do. i feel so alone in this world and i really want to die
 

Luliby

Staff Alumni
#2
Is there any way you can call that teacher and ask to meet with them or talk with them? Do you have anyone you can call and talk to?

It sounds like you are in a serious crisis and you will need help and support to get through this. I wish I was there to bundle you up in a warm blanket and hold you while you cry.

You are not alone and there are others who want and can help you. We just got to get you to them! Even if it's the ER room.

Don't hurt yourself. We can work this out. Send me a message if you want to talk.
 

Forgotten_Man

Well-Known Member
#3
Yeah I get those feelings from time to time. When stress and life just are too much. I lock myself in my room and black out my windows and snuggle my stuffies. That is all I can do.

I find the darkness reguvinating. it is very relaxing to lie in the dark all day and all night. I know when I am home my kitty comes into the darkness as well. I scoop her up and snuggle her too. Just relax and don't think let all your depression and stress out in some way... and you will feel better.
 
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cant_go_on

#4
no, i cant call the teacher. she has her own life. i dont have any one else to talk to. im always so lonely. never have anyone to talk to. i hate feeling this way. i know i need help, but, i dont know how to ask for it. partly i am to scared to get help. and the other part i dont want help. after i wrote this i went upstairs to my bed and slept. wishing that i would not wake up. i havent been able to keep anything down, except for water. i am so stressed out, depressed, and scared. i really want to just go crawl into a ball and die.

im tired of this. i cant even express how i feel right now.

i wish my mom was here. even though i woulnt know what to say to her. i hate being alone. i keep cutting myself, debating on whether or not i should just do it. get it over with. that way i wont have to deal with things. i have the pills, and the razors, and im ready to go.

i dont know what i should do right now.
 
#5
I know what you mean bty struggling about going to school, and going back home after a little while. I really do, my report card is the proof.

I can recommend talking with someone...it helps...Keeping it all inside will only get harder and harder...

Good luck to you...
 
C

cant_go_on

#7
Im Done. Im Tired Of Letting People Down. Im Tired Of Not Being Able To Be Of Any Support To Anyone. Im Tired Of Failing In Everything That I Do. Thank God I Am Home Alone Right Now. Im Done!!!!!!
 

Luliby

Staff Alumni
#9
How are you doing? Please think about this.. when you feel like you have nothing to loose.. when you've reached the bottom of the barrel, it's time to make a change. But not suicide. Life is something to loose.

Instead, this is the time to take new chances... talk to your parents, call the suicide hotline, come back on line and let us know how your doing. If you feel like you just can't resist the suicidal urges, call 911 or go to the ER.

Because having suicidal thoughts does not mean you have no choice, it does not mean your life has reached a point of such desperation that there is no other path. Suicidal thinking happens when your up against a wall and your mind can't think of any other course. Thats why i'm glad you have come to this site. We have a lot of members with a lot of experience about being in the spot you are now... and there is a way out worth living for.

Tell us your situation. I know you've been struggling for a long time now, that school is more than you can handle at present. You have a teacher who can help you.. sounds like they would really like to. Trust me, let it out. Yell us, tell this teacher, about your struggles and how hopeless it all seems.

There are other paths, paths your teacher can help direct you too.

Talk to us.
 
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