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Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Matt93, Sep 24, 2010.

  1. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    I can safely say, I felt shit today. Empty, and alone. Really really didn't want to go to college, couldn't be bothered to work.

    Even had one of my dearest friends willing me to stay in college as long as I could, so that I didn't do anything stupid. Yeah, I felt that bad. Just wanted to let go of the pain. Right now I'm struggling to keep my eyes open, not from tiredness, but the want to sleep forever.

    Walking to get the bus I felt like jumping out in front of it instead, but my friend stopped me, just from texting me. And again, earlier tonight, house party while suicidal, yay. Get drunk to the point it's dangerous. But again my friend is there to text me and stop me. It's amazing how much texts can help, and amazing how much people can help, without being there.

    I love my friend, I love her very much. Yet she doesn't know that :)
  2. MakeChanges

    MakeChanges New Member

    Matt93....I guess almost everyone has times when they feel low, and maybe don't feel they will ever come out of that, but you can!
    It almost is always down to just not appreciating the things we take for granted....what we have achieved, who loves us, a roof over our heads, water in the tap and food on the table........the best one I always feel is waking up each morning, which a lot of people didn't today.

    We are responsible for our own quality of life becasue we become what we think about.........and only we are in control of that.

    With the brief details you give you still have things in your life that others don't........why not be the best that you can?.....you are special...we all are!
  3. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    Thanks, I know what you mean. I'm not going to let it kill me. I've got to be there for my friends, and even when I'm depressed I look toward the positive. There's no denying I can make my life better, it's just having the desire to. Because unfortunately what I feel now, I've lost that desire.
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Time to talk to your doctor okay time to get on new meds or change dose of you old ones time to get you feeling better okay. Depression god it is so terrible when it hits but you have to hit back okay by doing the right things for you. Talk to your doctor NOW and get meds to help you no need to stay where you are in this pain Get help so you can be there for your friend and really enjoy the time at college okay take care
  5. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    I've got a doctors appointment for next Saturday. So I'll see what happens. Take care of yourself too.