Tonight I STOP

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by resistance, Sep 30, 2006.

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  1. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    This past week in particular my self harm has been off the wall. The other day I cut my leg and it was bleeding quite a bit. I woke up two hours later and it was bleeding.. I doubt very much it was bleeding for the whole two hours because I'd have thought I'd pass out, I must have caught it or something but either way, it was nasty. Tonight I cut my leg at about 6pm, at 9pm the pain was still extreme and I'm having problems walking, it was an akward place to cut and again, it was bleeding quite a bit but now it's stopped. I know my self harm is getting worse, 6 months ago, one cut 'per self harm episode' was enough but overtime one cut isn't enough, it's now turned into more cuts and I sometimes go over and over the cuts I hate it... Well, that's a lie. I do like self harm (the pain etc..) but I realise I need to stop and tonight I am very determined I'm not going to cut again... It's going to be difficult. Very difficult indeed.. but I hope to update this post in 7 days to say I'm self harm free... let's hope.
     
  2. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    hun im so proud that your soo determined to get thru this, i wish and hope with all my heart that you are able to complete this difficult but necessary task, and i look forward to reading a post in 7 days time saying you've gone a full week! i wish you all the best hun :hug:
     
  3. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Hey sweetie, I have been worried about you lately.....I am sorry your self harm has gotten so bad....but I beleive in you...you are much stronger than you beleive, think or feel.


    But I am so proud of you for deciding to try and stop and I have faith in you, even if you have a little slip up, you can still get back on track, it doesn't mean you are a bad, weak person or anything...it just means you are human....and honestly.....progress goes up and down. it is healthy.



    Remember I am here for you and I will pray for you. :hug:


    :hug:

    :flowers:

    :cheekkiss

    xxx

    With hugs,
    Carolyn.
     
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Hey hun, I am glad you have made this decision to stop the SH. If you want to give daily updates that would be great too. We are here to support you the best we can and make sure you caan do what you want to do. I have faith in you. I know you can do this. :hug:
     
  5. thedeafmusician

    thedeafmusician Staff Alumni

    Im proud of ya that you're gonna try to stop SH... its damn hard, but it is defnintely worth it.

    TDM
     
  6. me_

    me_ Guest

    I wish you all the best. :smile:
     
  7. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Thank you all for your support. :hug:
     
  8. wienerman

    wienerman Guest

    hun we all love you and are here to support you all the way. mega :hug:'s
     
  9. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    Res, I'm incredibly proud of you for trying to stop sh. Know that we're here for you. My pm box and email is always open for you ;)

    :hug:

    xxx
    Ester
     
  10. itachi

    itachi Well-Known Member

    :) :) :) :) Gives a Well Done :poke:
     
  11. delicateshadow

    delicateshadow Antiquitie's Friend

    good for you.

    it is possible.

    :)

    *sends support*
     
  12. Lou

    Lou Well-Known Member

    Well Done :) I'm sending you loads of support with this message :smile:

    {{{hugs}}} to you x
     
  13. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    Res, hun, hows it going? *hug* :hug:
     
  14. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    It's going ok hun, there's been a few times when it was really difficult but I haven't given it to it, and I hope I can carry on doing so. :hug:
     
  15. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Good, keep us posted and let me know if youneed anything. :hug:







    xxx:hug:,
    Carolyn.
     
  16. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    I'm proud of you Res *hugs tight*
     
  17. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    sending you all the will and positive thoughts possible.. you deserve to have a life.. u r special and u dont even know it.... i wish you could see what others see... well in our case read...:) ...sunshine and laughter ... u deserve it
     
  18. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Today has been really difficult. My automatic response to feeling annoyed with myself or others, when I'm upset or any negative emotion at all is to cut myself and today has been one of them days where I've thought about it a lot, especially this evening and I didn't cut although I really felt the urge to. I also went to hit the wall and bang my head against it, like I used to do but I guess that's a form of self harm too and I don't want to let myself down. So instead I walked around the house and went outside for a bit to chill out (almost literally, it's freezing out there). Four days, yay go me. Three more now to reach the first target I aimed for.

    Hugs to all :hug:
     
  19. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    yay!!!!!!!!!!! well done on the four days hun! especially today, hoping you can get to a week!! :hug:
     
  20. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    I'd say congrats to that Res! :) yay for you !! I'm very proud of you sweets!

    xxx
    Est
     
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