Brownie,
I am sorry you are feeling so bad. I feel that way myself. May I ask what kind of changes have you been trying to make? I know that sometimes I try to make too many changes to myself (all in the name of "self improvement" or some other moronic reason) at the same time. Then, I end up getting overwhelmed and make no progress and then frustration and depression set in. Are you perhaps trying to make too many changes or do too many things at once?
May I suggest taking some time for yourself? Nothing fancy. I know that sometimes works for me. Just a walk outside, even if it's cold. Or a day in a bookstore reading comic books and enjoying the strange looks people give me since I'm a 40 something man reading Batman comic books. And the even stranger glances I get after I leave a couple hours later after having read 20 comics and maybe buying one
Well, anyway, that works for me sometimes..... not expensive, not fancy. Try to perhaps find your own thing. I call it "simple self-indulgence."