Too much pain

I hate being in love... It hurt me so much that i can barely cope with life, everything need effort to be done, even small things...

With every day my depression is worse. I have huge problems with my memory, i dont remember what have i done in past 3 days and i cant remember almost anything what happen in last 6 months, since i got depressed. I cant stand the fact that i am still single. Next week i have my 17th birthday and when i start think about it i get anxiety attacks. When i was 14 i say to myself there is plenty of time to have gf... But i am slowly running out of time... I dont know... 2 or 3 years latter it will be too late for me... Most guys at age of 20 had have girlfriend and sex, i even didnt kiss a girl. I cant stand it anymore... It hurt me so much... And dont say you must wait... I am waiting since i was 11, in last 2 years i put so much effort in it, but because of fucking social anxiety i can hardly ask a girl, or if i do (i need 5 months at least to tell a girl that i like her) she reject me.

 

You're holding yourself to an unrealistic standard. Most people don't have meaningful relationships until their mid-20s, and I think it's especially unrealistic that you're trying to attain such a relationship through the barrier of social anxiety.

I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass here, I suffer from the same anxiety problems and am also in the same situation with regard to ladies, and I am 22.

I know that this suggestion will just harmlessly bounce off of you, but have you ever thought about (and actively tried) saying "fuck relationships", being happy for yourself, and not relying on the presence of others to improve your life? I have. Removing that one additional expectation and that extra little bit of pressure made things a hell of a lot easier.

 

First of all, social fobia is not an excuse. But it would be much easier without it. I am not unrealistic- all i wish is that i would have girlfriend which would love and respect me. Most of the people i know have it, and most of them are in relationship for longer than 6 months, so i dont think its so unrealistic, i dont want to marry yet:tongue:

 

No social anxiety isn't an excuse, but it makes what you're after a great deal more difficult.

 

maybe you arent trying hard enough.

 

you are not running out of time, slow down, take a deep breath, you need to calm down and think. you are not running out of time, you are not running out of time, if you are interested in a person try being friends with them first.