It's just too much. I can't deal with it. Why does the worse always happen? I told myself, that if this ever happens, I would need to end my life. That this would be the last straw. It's late right now, everyone is alseep. Now would be the best time if i plan on doing something. Why am i writing this, for help, for someone to say its all going to be ok? i dont know. i just wish it were all over.